tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5091306831198889432024-03-05T10:11:13.853-07:00Little Painted NailsPosts by a dad that's just trying to get things right. Currently batting about .258.chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.comBlogger118125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-88718637841622937852023-01-06T14:15:00.000-07:002023-01-06T14:15:33.684-07:00The Little Painted Nails in the Coffin<p> </p><p class="MsoNormal">Something happened a few weeks ago.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not going to go too far into it, but
suffice it to say, due to the actions of someone who I don’t even know, this
will be the last post of Little Painted Nails.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">After 8 years and a few hundred posts, it’s time to put the
baby to bed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Admittedly, it’s sad for
me. This was a passion project and to walk away from it under weird
circumstances feels a little empty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
would normally have gone a little more grandiose.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A big Ang Lee ending with explosions and
doves flying out. That being said, this wasn’t a snap decision.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought about it and I think it’s time to
go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I think it would be best to enjoy the time I had with it as
opposed to bemoaning how it ended.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Over the years I’ve been doing this there have been diaper
changes and soccer games and training wheels.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There have been tee shots and basketball games and hot sauce
challenges.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’ve dealt with illness and
injury and loss. In the end there were laughs and struggles and tears and
love.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The website has had well over 100 thousand views and (for
the most part) the comments have been kind and supportive. I really appreciate
everyone who took the time to blow off work for five or ten minutes here and
there to read my ramblings.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp7CY8BKMmiZFVpysecCAYeRXgn6S2TCc3Is_i4iQYdI-RBkJ3IIJE1ovrZndBWhC4ByQhJPdErGmLMC73KQrR6MmKXSrzcGgvG-_ZgbDNH8VR8Ukk5h95SvPVS9W4xV6LRh0fQHuy5rqKrb0PkySI1GQ5Krp15Ao7X8b6OYkXdh4WgyEVjQO3J73Z1g/s889/mean3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="582" data-original-width="889" height="131" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp7CY8BKMmiZFVpysecCAYeRXgn6S2TCc3Is_i4iQYdI-RBkJ3IIJE1ovrZndBWhC4ByQhJPdErGmLMC73KQrR6MmKXSrzcGgvG-_ZgbDNH8VR8Ukk5h95SvPVS9W4xV6LRh0fQHuy5rqKrb0PkySI1GQ5Krp15Ao7X8b6OYkXdh4WgyEVjQO3J73Z1g/w200-h131/mean3.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><br />The idea of giving my girls life lessons through funny
stories and weird experiences has proven to be a good one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They seem to have liked it and I have
received a ton of feedback from other dads who have taken my words to heart and
even a couple who have said they are doing something similar now for their
little ones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People who have read this
over the last half dozen years, I appreciate it, I truly do, and feel free to
reach out if the conclusion here seems abrupt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m happy to share the back story and I think you’ll understand why I A)
won’t discuss it here and B) have chosen to close up this particular shop. I will probably do something else in the future, but this iteration of my writing has run its course.<p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I think I should also offer a brief “Thank You” to my wife,
and by extension, my family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My wife has
always been supportive of this project even in times where it was a little
invasive when our proverbial curtain got pulled back a little bit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There were times when it was
collaborative.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I needed reeling
in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I was just wrong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">She, as always, has been my rock and my best friend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">To the girls, I hope you read this in its entirety one day
and think to yourselves “Man, my old man was a goof, but he really cared”, or
at least that I gave you a few ideas before my senility really kicked in. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I suppose I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t give you some parting
advice from this blog.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">For that I would say, strive for happiness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We don’t know how long we get to screw around
on this blue marble.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It doesn’t make
sense not to enjoy the time you have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Be Compassionate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Being kind has a way of finding its way back to you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We all are climbing uphill against something.
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Be a foothold and not a loose stone for
someone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They’ll recognize it most of
the time, trust me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Be Present. In the world of cell phones and schoolwork, it’s
easy to become a touch of an island of yourself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s a quote from a great philosopher from
my youth </p><blockquote style="border: none; margin: 0 0 0 40px; padding: 0px;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><i>“Life moves pretty fast.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If
you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” </i>F. Bueller.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></p></blockquote><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">I’d hate for you to miss something great
because you were posting something on Tik Tok.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Try your best to live in the “now”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’ll offer you a lot more experiences than SnapTok or TweetBook ever
will.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Be Healthy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t
know what happens after we shed our mortal coil, but I know while you’re hanging
out on the blue marble, you only get one vehicle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This body of ours needs upkeep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Get up, move, dance, run, play sports, travel,
explore, eat strange foods, get underwater, compete, laugh, love, hug, it’ll
all do that shell of yours some good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
way I see it, it’s better to be able to run a mile or lift a ton and not need
it than the other way around.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Remember who you are and where you came from.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You have a big, wonderful family who loves
you very much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your mom and dad, even
when it doesn’t seem it, puts you first when we make decisions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We want nothing more than for you to grow up
and be happy, healthy, kind young women.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>So, when it seems we are being a couple of hard asses, consider, while
we love being your parents and your friends, we are your parents first.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your grandparents and aunts and uncles love
you very much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes distance gets
in the way, but they think of you often.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Most of all, despite the occasional fight and snide remark, the three of
you are the greatest friends each of you will ever have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They will be your shoulder to cry on and your
comic relief.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t take those
relationships lightly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hug often and
apologize easily.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Winning an argument
isn’t always winning and losing one can be the best winning you can do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Finally, remember, your dad loves you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You are the best thing to ever happen to
me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To be someone’s greatest thing is an
honor, and you are just that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nothing has
made this life more worth living than you three and your mother.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We all have our shortcomings, for sure, but
know that, despite anything you have fallen short on, you have made one chubby
old man’s life impossibly good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’ve
given me joy that I couldn’t have imagined before I got married.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you, little ladies, for all you have
given me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love you very much.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-89810260831263180382022-10-24T13:32:00.003-06:002022-10-24T13:58:19.494-06:00Quarterbacks, Balloons and Goldfish<p>We have a saying in our house “Balloons and Goldfish”. What that refers to, are things that are
temporary and need to be enjoyed in the “now”.
It was always a way of softening the inevitable blow of a pet floating
upside down in the tank or a balloon becoming a handful of latex garbage. </p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It also may have been a mistake.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Balloons and goldfish may offer the feeling of loss that a three-year-old
can wrap their little head around.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Hopefully they move from balloons to goldfish to maybe a cat running
away to a harsh breakup.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQxP1HEQV8lM2w_MN0DXoA5x6KrWhTV-fSt8WvXmbKrCaAXi9BfNOLn8BD9TwN5uQ83x8g7IIYQUvyfzKRG9DqoB2KsFTZ3BFF_1l5uJDnkxbTkgDk3Vrlru80CpbUUNXus09E0pxsujcyVfB-pAtBiP1RvaYprF5WGBaN7H-glmM9bet-hw7jIuwYlg/s4032/mace%20han.jpg" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQxP1HEQV8lM2w_MN0DXoA5x6KrWhTV-fSt8WvXmbKrCaAXi9BfNOLn8BD9TwN5uQ83x8g7IIYQUvyfzKRG9DqoB2KsFTZ3BFF_1l5uJDnkxbTkgDk3Vrlru80CpbUUNXus09E0pxsujcyVfB-pAtBiP1RvaYprF5WGBaN7H-glmM9bet-hw7jIuwYlg/w150-h200/mace%20han.jpg" width="150" /></a></div><br />That last one is the one to focus on today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My middle, Macy, is a striking young lady.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She is pretty, funny, athletic, has a great
sense of humor and impeccable fashion sense.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She is, even to thirteen-year-olds young eyes, a catch.<o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">A catch in the way that you expect her to be the kind of girl
that wins prom queen and dates the quarterback.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The latter is in fact true, that is, true until yesterday.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Macy had a boyfriend (or a middle school version of one) who
was the QB of the school’s football team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Had” is the functional word in that sentence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The young QB, we’ll call him ‘Lance’ for the purposes of
this story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Lance decided he needed his
freedom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No problem. Certainly didn’t
expect her first dip into romance to be her last.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Balloons and goldfish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The problem is twofold.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The first is that he did the deed via text.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was out of the blue and not the most
articulate thing in the world (excusable as he is only thirteen).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The second problem is his social media post
saying that he is “single and taking applications”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Funny? Sure, but I’m his ex’s dad so he’ll obviously
wind up on the wrong side of this blog post.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">In all actuality, 'Lance' is a good kid who dipped his toe into
the dating pool for the first time as well. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’s a stand-up guy but of course his breakup
was awful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’s never done it
before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The nice thing was that one lesson
seemed to stick with Macy.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Balloons and goldfish” and apparently romances with thirteen
year old quarterbacks are all things that don’t last.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She took it fine and the two are actually
back to being friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here little ladies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its simple, boys are dumb.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s true, but it’s a little more nuanced
than that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Boys are dumb, but they get
better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They get better, but that’s much
later.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In their early teens they are
just trying to figure it all out, their bodies, their place, and girls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In their late teens they are trying to figure
out their place and girl’s bodies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In
their twenties, its college and work and moving out of their mother’s
basements.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thirties?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Figuring out what happened in their
twenties.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Forties involve wives and kids
and homeownership and plumbing and heating and groceries.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fifties?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve just started those and I still have no idea about girls, the ones
my age or my daughters.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, I guess I’ll
speculate that boys cease being dumb in their sixties.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">In all honesty, if you want a boy to like you, find a
sincere one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One that sticks up for you
when times are tough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One that respects
the people around him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One that does
things for you even when it is in contrast to what he wants to do himself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Find one that will go to the craft store with
you<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>even if he kicks and screams the
whole time and one that will take you to restaurants and movies that he doesn’t
like.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">And here’s the tough part ladies, be someone that will do
the same for your partner.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Relationships
are about compromise and sacrifice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As
you date in middle school and high school and college and in the work world, look
for someone who is willing to sacrifice and willing to compromise (and one that
can cook isn’t the worst thing either). <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-41560134337369590762022-09-21T13:58:00.001-06:002022-09-21T13:58:46.134-06:00What Color Are Mermaids Anyway?<p> </p><p class="MsoNormal">I work online and therefore; YouTube tends to be the
soundtrack of most of my days. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I listen
to the news, music, audio books and movie trailers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I listen to stand up comedy, sports blogs and
spoilers.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">And movie and television reviews.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It’s the last one that I’m writing about today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">A few years ago, there was a rumbling of Idris Elba playing
James Bond.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To me, he’s a perfect
fit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Handsome, sophisticated and a better-than-capable
action star.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The internet did not agree.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Not because he couldn’t act, or he has some personal history that would
disqualify him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>James Bond is
traditionally played by white actors, and Elba, while sophisticated, has a
pigmentation issue that the internet couldn’t abide.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">To date, he still hasn’t gotten the role.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Recently, another role was being awarded. There is a live
action version of The Little Mermaid being released, and unlike the 007 series,
they cast an African American in the title role.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The internet couldn’t let that slide.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Over a million people “disliked” the trailer and some of the
responses to the coming attraction are downright despicable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It seems closed minded and ignorant to put ones preconceived
notions above the direction of the film maker who is laying out hundreds of
millions of dollars to make their vision.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">In the James Bond example, the objection to a black actor
seems awful, in the Little Mermaid, silly.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I’ll explain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Not having Idris Elba play Bond doesn’t make sense.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s simple racism.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Racism or terrible taste in actors.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Little Mermaid is a different animal
altogether.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizcyu1CE2GJ9wZ8BNhcfyxSjZOwr_9Q8nN02czJ2rwEs4zuv4dVgiK-706moBKXnzdYhGu8jDM9H27H7a5jYHDHRAnvB_lCoHHxD6DsFvSQ-mPx_bdG4SPnY1uSEfOCGDtre3kzVBu32LHKp6A07M73wPJkZOJG3vU4xIkuunHPUzOYeAOrXMwRU3wlg/s1613/macemaid.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1613" data-original-width="872" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizcyu1CE2GJ9wZ8BNhcfyxSjZOwr_9Q8nN02czJ2rwEs4zuv4dVgiK-706moBKXnzdYhGu8jDM9H27H7a5jYHDHRAnvB_lCoHHxD6DsFvSQ-mPx_bdG4SPnY1uSEfOCGDtre3kzVBu32LHKp6A07M73wPJkZOJG3vU4xIkuunHPUzOYeAOrXMwRU3wlg/s320/macemaid.jpg" width="173" /></a></div><br />The Little Mermaid is the story of an underage half fish,
half teenager who decides that she was born in the wrong body and longs to be
transformed into a human so she can be with a guy without fish parts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Her father objects to her trans desires so she seeks out
someone who can perform the procedure without her father’s approval.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the end, her dad finally, despite her only
being sixteen years old, approves of her transformation and marriage.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">So, here’s the rub.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People
(which may be a loud but small number) object to the skin color of a fictional species
but have no problem with her trans lifestyle or the fact that her betrothed is
eager to engage in interspecies shenanigans.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Seems like a tremendous oversight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Maybe as bad as ignoring that Elsa’s parents locked her in her bedroom
for a decade because she was different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The point here little ladies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Beyond the fish fetish issues?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its that what’s on the outside really doesn’t
matter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The young lady playing Ariel in The
Little Mermaid can act and she is a heck of a singer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s really all that should matter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The vitriol over a black stormtrooper, or James
Bond or mermaid is inexplicable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In
reality, it applies to your day-to-day life as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If someone doesn’t wear just the right clothes,
or carries a little extra weight or is somehow different than you, let it go,
or on second thought, embrace it. We are all the ‘different’ one at one point
or another and how great was it when someone understood you or just spent time
with you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For some people, being
different isn’t a phase.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Being of a
different race, or gender or having a different sexual identity or having a
handicap or literally anything else that can offer someone a way to see them as
“other” is a way of life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It doesn’t
have to be a bad one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Different does not
equal bad, disliking someone for being different does.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-12976888638634624142022-09-15T16:43:00.001-06:002022-09-15T16:43:14.971-06:00"She Was Quirky, But She Loved Us"<p> My brother offered a toast at my aunt’s celebration of life
this week that struck me as perfect; “She was quirky, but she loved us”. With that, eight or ten of us each raised a
small glass of Irish whiskey and extended a salud.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Rosemary Holland, my aunt, left us a few weeks ago and the
last few months have been a whirlwind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Rosemary
(or Roe to those who knew her) was having massive back problems that left her
bed ridden and elected to have surgery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The doctor explained the risks and the probable negative outcomes and
without taking a breath she decided to have it. It was the effects of the surgery
that would eventually take her life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvtzVYizqAs_TQ0qvlwZiy7FwRsMbTzu8NMknV2WKr8c3hMwSIHzH7t-j4wfH_CxOL5_heQ6Offho-eC7xfm7SNwB3hxVzgQnCHStETP7CXKF43gOsGfG-G4NRtAa_gpy-_O9ppOxlaMpCB3Td-wY2flGN6r39dJgXhld0nW9LKA6s2lmKbygyiHMoiA/s1760/Roe%20Obit%5B63653%5D.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1760" data-original-width="1249" height="222" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvtzVYizqAs_TQ0qvlwZiy7FwRsMbTzu8NMknV2WKr8c3hMwSIHzH7t-j4wfH_CxOL5_heQ6Offho-eC7xfm7SNwB3hxVzgQnCHStETP7CXKF43gOsGfG-G4NRtAa_gpy-_O9ppOxlaMpCB3Td-wY2flGN6r39dJgXhld0nW9LKA6s2lmKbygyiHMoiA/w157-h222/Roe%20Obit%5B63653%5D.png" width="157" /></a></div><br />Her decision to move forward with the surgery without giving
stock to the negatives was about as emblematic of her life as you can get.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Roe lived her life unapologetically and
without remorse.<o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Strangely, it was part of her charm.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Part of it, but not all of it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was also generous, funny, had a
contagious laugh and as mentioned earlier, she was quirky.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It’s her quirkiness that really stands out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She lived with a certain amount of techno
fear that a lot of people her age has but he means of combating it were what
makes it strange.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">For example, she had a collection of Kindle devices.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As she lost mobility and couldn’t get to her
computer as easily, she turned to a Kindle to satisfy her online needs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The problem being, she didn’t know how to
close the windows she would open.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her
Kindle would bog down with the open with the thousands of open windows and she
would get frustrated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We showed her and
showed her how to close them, but it became easier just to use one of those
windows to open Amazon and order another Kindle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her Kindles were, for lack of a better
description, disposable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I suppose that was part of her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What’s the easiest answer as opposed to the
best one?<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I remember having a dinner purchased on QVC and mailed to
her house.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I picked out (and picked up) my
Christmas presents for years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I watched
for years as she purchased the first car she looked at or even the first condo
she walked through.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Maybe it was the easiest way, sure, but she also wasn’t
really caught up in “stuff”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perfect was
almost never the enemy of the good for her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She liked what she liked and that was enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">She liked the color aqua, perhaps too much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had a purple air fryer, basically new,
but then discovered an aqua one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Obviously,
you replace your brand-new air fryer with the aqua one, when you like what you
like.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">She liked what she liked and she loved who she loved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was fortunate to be one of those
people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I am fairly critical of myself and some of my decisions, but
she was deliberately oblivious to them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
wanted nothing more than those she loved to be happy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps she had funny ways of showing it, probably
because of the pedestal she put us on, but she just wanted joy for us.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">As she got older a lot of the responsibility of caring for
her fell to my mother, my wife, and myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It was something this unapologetic lady felt apologetic about.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It never bothered me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I always felt like it was a way to give back
to someone who gave so much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here girls?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Beyond the missing someone truly important to us?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe don’t get caught up in the stuff.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To be honest, it’s a lesson to learn but she
wasn’t always the best example.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Roe once went to a psychic and she told Roe that in past
lives she tried to “buy” love instead of giving from herself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She definitely needs to work on that her next
time around as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She loved each of
you so much that sending you gifts in the mail made her happy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Making sure the Christmas tree was bulging
underneath made her happy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But it made
her happy because you were so happy. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Your joy was her goal.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It’s a good way to live.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here, is just that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t get caught up in the stuff.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do you think at the end, there was anything
beyond yourselves that we could bring to the hospital that would have lifted
her spirits?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There was no toy, no snack,
no “thing” that made her happier than seeing you.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">That’s the thing about life, you get the chance to see what
is really important when its too late to appreciate it as long as you’d
like.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-30681230790258628332022-08-21T18:29:00.002-06:002022-08-21T18:29:23.726-06:0072 Hours of Freedom, The Adventures of Runaway Jerry<p> I haven’t written for a while, at least not on this
platform, but I intend to begin to right that ship over the coming weeks. Summer makes writing tough as the houses
usually calm interior becomes a hub for snack requests and shuttle runs. </p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Today’s story begins with my eldest’s ride to school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My wife and Avery drove off and I sat at my
desk to start working and my phone rang.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It was my wife.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of all the things
she could be calling for, I couldn’t have guessed that it was a request for a box,
to house a turtle, that was walking across the road.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I pulled up and My wife and daughter were standing over a soccer
cleat sized turtle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He had made it
across the street and was now trying to sneak under a fence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We were able to corral the little guy into a
box and the ladies continued on their journey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I put the turtle and its box in my front seat and headed home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><br />Fun fact, turtles can escape Amazon boxes and apparently,
enjoy riding shotgun without their view impeded by cardboard.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A quick decision was made to race home and
wrassle him there instead of pulling over and shoving him in a box that won’t keep
him anyway.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">My first, and as luck would have it, only stroke of luck was
that the terrapin was taller than the space under my passenger seat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He wedged himself in for easy capture.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Very convenient.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTJL5qf-OlA8gHVUi48i4mU_I5KIVSUkHhGf_zkK7e2vzDwZbyo9cwBRJaAYairuR6H_Rb2kjTXinUtVOxxBQGRvi5672OUQUij_Uh_CAxdP_-NcxkuZH9PXKZhgP-S0CBoAquAztcXfwXWmMOSBh98ckFGLd7D4kq2TVzU3nq0L7oXXCjTPiXN-rXtw/s660/Jerry.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="660" data-original-width="600" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTJL5qf-OlA8gHVUi48i4mU_I5KIVSUkHhGf_zkK7e2vzDwZbyo9cwBRJaAYairuR6H_Rb2kjTXinUtVOxxBQGRvi5672OUQUij_Uh_CAxdP_-NcxkuZH9PXKZhgP-S0CBoAquAztcXfwXWmMOSBh98ckFGLd7D4kq2TVzU3nq0L7oXXCjTPiXN-rXtw/w182-h200/Jerry.jpg" width="182" /></a></div>Fortunately for me, but not for its previous residents, we
have an empty fish tank.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Come to find
out, turtles don’t like being in fish tanks as they can’t see the glass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A fact proven by the endless banging of the
little dude’s shell hitting the sides of the tank.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While I got really tired of the banging, I
had to admire his tireless moxi.<o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">My wife began investigating what kind of turtle it was (a
box turtle) and whether or not it was wild or a pet (unknown).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">When my girls arrived home from school, they were excited by
the prospect of keeping our new shelled guest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>They figured that if no one stepped forward to claim the turtle, then clearly,
he needed to live with us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can follow
their logic, while I am not an undeniable pet lover, I am however, a tremendous
softie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">While the girls were entertaining the turtle and entertaining
their odds of keeping it, my wife was searching Facebook and Craigslist and
Nextdoor to see if anyone was missing, wanting, or knew what to do with a box
turtle once it was in a fish tank on your kitchen table.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">There was no response.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The Humane Society said that we should keep the turtle for
72 hours to make sure our search efforts had time to percolate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In reality, I felt the good people at the
Humane Society wanted to allow ample bonding time between the tortoise and my
little ones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Their plan was already working.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">After several hours of kid’s laughter and some shell to
glass banging our doorbell rang.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On my
porch was a man, his wife and a six-year-old boy. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The man asked, somewhat meekly, “Did you guys find a turtle?”<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">When we produced said turtle the little boy squealed “JERRY!”<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Their family was happier than mine was.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We found out that Jerry had been on the lamb
for three days and made it almost a block, making them the most recoverable pets
possible.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here, little ladies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s a couple, actually.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They both involve sacrifice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>First, when Mommy and Avery took the time to
stop and then call in the reinforcements may just have saved Jerry from
becoming a road pancake.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The second sacrifice
is the one where we found the owner despite the desire to keep Jerry to
yourselves.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The sadness you all felt was
bested only by the joy of the family who were reunited with Jerry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even Jerry seemed happy to see his family, if
you can believe it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">All in all, the sacrifice of time that Avery and Mommy made and
the sacrifice of letting Jerry go home combined to create a heartfelt moment
for that family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They had conceded that Jerry
was gone forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Their reunion was
unexpected and that made it all the sweeter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>They couldn’t have been more grateful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Honestly, I couldn’t have been either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You made a little boy’s year.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-78971777256456613362021-12-10T08:21:00.000-07:002021-12-10T08:21:07.073-07:00Turning 50 isn't all Sunshine...or is it?<p>Begrudgingly, I turned 50 this week. It’s been a while since I’ve written for my blog,
in large part because of my upcoming birthday.
My wife put together a very special birthday for me, frankly, a little
out of my tax bracket but suffice it to say, I entered the back half of my
particular century in paradise. </p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I didn’t mind turning thirty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I loved turning forty and found myself
shocked that I was so apprehensive about hitting the big 5-0.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it’s that mid-life crisis you hear
about.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it's that my sense of
accomplishment is going the opposite direction of my waistline.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Any way you slice it, I wasn’t ready and
father time didn’t care.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I traveled to Mexico on an extremely early morning flight
and started my fiftieth a little under rested and a lot down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t stay that way for too long.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">A funny thing happens every time I go to paradise.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It isn’t the sun or the cheap beverages.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While I love being with my wife and family,
it isn’t them either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s the people
you bump into.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They seem to smile easier
than I do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When problems arise, they
handle it with a better sense of calm than I do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When day turns into night and night turns
into early morning, they seem to just laugh off whatever comes their way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I was having dinner with my dive master a few years ago and
in a less than candid moment, he told me about dock fees, and license fees and
the cost of gasoline for his boat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It
was an unguarded moment where he described that, despite owning his own
company, that times could get tighter than he liked.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I asked, probably clumsily, if he was okay.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“Mister Chris,” he told me, “Look around.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I dive for a living.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Look where I live. The ocean is my office!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We were eating tacos at the time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In a restaurant with plastic tables and loud
music.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He leaned in and was more impassioned
than usual. “It's easy to live without money in your pocket when you’re happy”.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgoVhC1x1i6qpp-5OUw4ZjdlfS8kMOSRwwdMC630jgLs2Frk40D_BWDlbasW5P-4KbM4ohS9k-BT6T30N4n6YW2Mbv0vNKHyyv2RXoQGckQQkD9e7E0VCGWpNtahzh-Bai1oqbh5V8k7gxGZajv67IUQCOIDmOV3u9req4JTNSFkj5e62CcgVIG4QxKgw=s3508" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2418" data-original-width="3508" height="221" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgoVhC1x1i6qpp-5OUw4ZjdlfS8kMOSRwwdMC630jgLs2Frk40D_BWDlbasW5P-4KbM4ohS9k-BT6T30N4n6YW2Mbv0vNKHyyv2RXoQGckQQkD9e7E0VCGWpNtahzh-Bai1oqbh5V8k7gxGZajv67IUQCOIDmOV3u9req4JTNSFkj5e62CcgVIG4QxKgw=s320" width="320" /></a></div>I went on a snorkeling tour yesterday and was lingering on
turning 50 and my station in life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
young men who took us out had the same easy smile that I’ve seen so often in
paradise.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I worked in the hospitality
industry for years and I’m pretty good at spotting who is working happily and
who is wearing the work smile mask.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>These weren’t fake.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were
happy to be doing what they were doing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The boat ride and the snorkeling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>These were guys that probably live with less than my dive master did. <o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><br />They understand something that I forget too often.</p><p class="MsoNormal"> “It's easy
to live without money in your pocket when you’re happy”. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Here’s the thing, girls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Victor, my dive master, wasn’t on a soap box when he talked about
happiness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was in a taco bar with a
beer in his hand and cabbage in his beard.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It wasn’t a scripted moment and, honestly, I would have liked to massage
his words into a more beautiful statement.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But it says what it says.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“It's easy to live without money in your pocket when you’re
happy”.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The way I took it then and the way I think about it now is
that we all need to stop chasing a bit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Money and happiness do not exist in a one-to-one ratio. </span>Does your car get you from “A” to “B”? Then it's fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No need to envy the car in the next
driveway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The way I thought about it on
my fiftieth is that I need to live a little slower and a little more simply. I spent my fiftieth surrounded by people I love, my feet in the sand and a boat drink in hand. It was a really good day. I need to remember to stop for a minute and appreciate that.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I’d like to go on about corporate greed and the “keeping up with
the Jonses” mentality that we all seem to have these days, but from where I’m
sitting, there is literally a hammock in the ocean and it has my name on
it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-47472236544292436432021-09-20T17:24:00.002-06:002021-09-20T17:24:44.672-06:00Somehow, I Made a 200 Mile Race Less Fun<p></p><p class="MsoNormal">A few weeks ago I participated in a race called the Wild
West Relay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For those who don’t know,
the Wild West Relay is a 200-mile relay race from Fort Collins to Steamboat
Springs Colorado.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For most teams, the
race takes about thirty hours and is riddled with pulled muscles, insomnia and
foot stink.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We pay for the privilege to
run it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are not bright.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Most of the runners have been with us for years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’ve had husband/wife tandems, brother/sister
and this year we even had a father/ daughter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We’ve had lawyers, restauranteurs, students, bartenders and bird
rescuers. The common thread for all of us?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Running perhaps?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nope. Morons,
one and all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Its something that I look forward to every year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This was the eight year I’ve run it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have a few runners that are in their tenth
or eleventh year. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a chance to see
friends that we don’t get to see often.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">For some reason, this year, my heart wasn’t in it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hate to say it, but I literally spent more
days trying to get out of the race than I did training for it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It showed.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">For a twelve-man team, each runner runs three legs ranging
from a few miles up to ten miles each.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My legs added up to approximately 16 miles and each of the three legs
were vastly different from one another.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My
first leg was a short but very uphill leg that is considered “very hard” by the
race organizer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I struggled more than I
expected.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was at around 8000 feet and
there was a lovely combination of a headwind and smoke-filled air from a nearby
forest fire.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was no fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">My second leg started around 3:00 in the morning and was a seven-mile
leg with rolling hills.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The only issue
with this one was the fact that my headlamp kept quitting on me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Running around in the mountains with passing
traffic, no shoulder and no light provided more than a couple of pant soiling
moments, but I think fear sped me along and made for my most enjoyable
leg.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">My final leg was the one that will stick with me for a
while.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is a five-mile leg that starts
at 9000 feet and loses 1800 feet by the finish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Sure, a nice downhill run is great.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This isn’t that. This is just gravity at work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You set off and hope for the best.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve run this leg once before and despite
being my fastest five mile run I’ve ever had, I hated every step of it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This year was much, much worse.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyWVHpnFPQgokNulaL_UXyZ0lipQxmCtoxvbwC1G44MMwYtQaLansNCww97PULTFjLpS-C2D7DxH4Tl4nGZYw6XxBT29lMsE_8Pz4bLb4KFoSTUo9EIy9XPUbrCjT-vIK4WjrDw-V4fSWR/s1369/wifey.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1369" data-original-width="1347" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyWVHpnFPQgokNulaL_UXyZ0lipQxmCtoxvbwC1G44MMwYtQaLansNCww97PULTFjLpS-C2D7DxH4Tl4nGZYw6XxBT29lMsE_8Pz4bLb4KFoSTUo9EIy9XPUbrCjT-vIK4WjrDw-V4fSWR/w197-h200/wifey.jpg" width="197" /></a></div>My first mile was fine, fast actually.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first mile had a 7:30 pace.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyone who knows me knows that is
uncharacteristic at best.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just after the
first mile I felt a ‘pop’ just above my knee.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>At first it was uncomfortable more than it was painful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Discomfort was a sensation that would last
only another mile or so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Discomfort gave
way to an achy pain that seemed to grow step by shitty step. My miles got
slower, 8:30, 9:00, 9:30 and then a 10:30.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My knee was killing me. To run that last mile at a 10:30 pretty much
defies physics.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Near impossible to fall
down a mountain that slowly. I had a tough time walking by the time I was
finished and wouldn’t run again for nearly a month. <o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><br />I’d like to make excuses, but it comes down to two things:
1) I didn’t want to be there and 2) my pre-race training reflected that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While I enjoyed seeing everyone, this was not
a banner job for your tubby writer friend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here, little ladies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a good one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you commit to something, commit to
it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wrap your mind around it and do the
best you can and apply yourself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Here is
the part where I could say, you’re part of a team and you owe it to them to do
your best, which is a fair but obvious point.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">There is another, far more selfish reason to commit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I got hurt, I would wager, because I hadn’t
trained well enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hated my first
leg for the same reason.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the spirit
of self-preservation, if you are going to commit to something, its best to be
in a position to keep yourself from hurting yourself while doing it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is a brand of “lazy tax” that you should
be reluctant to pay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I paid that lazy
tax for hours.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can tell you, I’d have
been happier if I had trained, or given my spot to someone else, or faked an
injury or manufactured a real injury or paid someone else to run.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I didn’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>A lesson I won’t soon forget, at least until my next race sign-up.<o:p></o:p></p><br /><p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-63955205464577837362021-08-19T11:58:00.000-06:002021-08-19T11:58:03.650-06:00Ten Goals in a Half? Seems Like a Lot!<p>Two of my daughters played in a soccer tournament this
weekend, my middle, Macy and my youngest, Darby. Macy is a very accomplished soccer player and
her team is more than competitive. Per
usual, Macy left the tournament with a medal, albeit silver, much to her
chagrin.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">But this post isn’t about made goals and wins, not off any
of my kid’s cleats, anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">To the uninitiated, a team is a team is a team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Any given day, any team can win.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In a perfect world, sure, but anyone who endured
2020 knows the world isn’t perfect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Because of the imbalance, every league splits its players into different
tiers based on ability.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For example, my
middle daughter plays on the “gold” team which is tier two only behind the “select”
team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Below Macy is the “white” team and
below that is “blue” where Darby plays.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">See, Darby, while enthusiastic, hasn’t hit any brand of
growth spurt yet and tends to be slower and less physical than most of the
other kids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She tends to be behind the
play as it migrates down the field.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It doesn’t
matter all that much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She’s having fun
and she will catch up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The problems, for the point of this story, are that A) Darby
has started playing goalie and B) the first team they played in the tournament
was a “premier” level team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A premier
team is the equivalent of the highest-level team in the tournament.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It was a recipe for disaster.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Anyone waiting for the “David versus Goliath” ending might
as well stop reading now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj97h3mZfSQD6Uc5KptHz1ZBY9iV1HHpsqDxxCdNTHPFmvGHQg3jpZttd2ux1j_e13lkDnjeYCTEqnAJD6mZNRXf4GvWdHaEGprQKZXCICeeLHkdJ7U37ip2zNWauqWeenbmFQs6rffjd0A/s960/big+goal.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="861" data-original-width="960" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj97h3mZfSQD6Uc5KptHz1ZBY9iV1HHpsqDxxCdNTHPFmvGHQg3jpZttd2ux1j_e13lkDnjeYCTEqnAJD6mZNRXf4GvWdHaEGprQKZXCICeeLHkdJ7U37ip2zNWauqWeenbmFQs6rffjd0A/w200-h179/big+goal.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><br />Darby was in goal for the second half of the game.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The team was already down 3-0 when she took
the net.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were behind big and it got
much, much worse.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Darby would allow ten goals in the second half.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was outmanned, as was her team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There was a sense, as the half went on, that
the girls had to endure the drubbing they were taking but their willingness to
fight back waned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The less the girls fought,
the worse it got for Darby in the net.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It was no one’s fault.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They ran
into a buzz saw and there wasn’t a lot they could do about it.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The worst part about it was the other team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The most politically correct way to describe
these 11-year-olds would be “snarky little shits”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Literally the kindest way I can find to
describe them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The girls made jabs at Darby.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As the goals mounted, the jabs got
worse.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The team would rip a goal past
Darby and mock her with a sarcastic “nice try goalie” then “it’s like you’re
playing for our team”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was audible to
the parents.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It concluded with a penalty
shot that went off Darby’s fingertips and left her in tears. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The game ended 13-0. After the game, Darby was a hybrid of
angry and embarrassed and sad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She asked
if she could skip the rest of the tournament, and truth be told, we were
tempted to let her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Deep down, her
mother and me knew that was the wrong thing to do and we sent her back into the
fray.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It felt like bad parenting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It was a feeling that would be exacerbated watching Darby putting the
goalie jersey back on for the first half of the next game.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“You’ve got to be joking” I thought to myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Yesterday wasn’t bad enough?”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was hoping that she would be put in
midfield where she could blend in and just get by.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead, what happened was remarkable. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">She was stopping balls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Her team was scoring.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At the end
of her half, the team was up 3-0.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
didn’t play goal in the second half as it was someone else’s turn.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When the game ended, she was happy. I was
relieved.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here, ladies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There’s a few.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first is this:
don’t let someone else take your joy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Those little girls, and their snarky little selves, made you want to
quit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Screw them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m proud of you quieting the noise and
playing again. Secondly, be brave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
took stones to go back on the field.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
fun you had with your teammates over the last few days is directly attributable
to the bravery you showed going back on the field, back in the net and back in
the line of fire.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I couldn’t be prouder
of you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sorry I doubted you. I’m
glad you went back to goalie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Finally, it’s about those sardonic little shits on the other
team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe you didn’t get the chance to
shut them up (nor did anyone else as they outscored their opponents 33-0 in the
tourney).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Every team, and I mean every
single one, gets their comeuppance at some point.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Any team that behaves the way they did will
not handle losing well. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Your team hugged and consoled each other.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You had a water balloon fight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You ate snacks and played with your teammates.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Winning as a team is easy, losing as a team
can be harder.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There was no blame
between one another.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The lesson is to be
a gracious winner and an optimistic loser.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This weekend your team was both.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You won a couple; you lost a couple and you had fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Seems about right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-51291423892843779872021-07-08T08:29:00.000-06:002021-07-08T08:29:23.219-06:00Just Because There's a Knock, Doesn't Mean You Have to Answer<p> I heard a quote a few weeks ago. Per usual, I feel like there is a need for
transparency here. I wrote this post
once a few weeks ago but didn’t love it and didn’t post it. This is a second run at it, so instead of “I
heard a quote today”, it’s “I heard a quote a few weeks ago”.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“You can't wait until life isn't hard anymore for you to
decide to be happy”<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It struck a chord a little harder than I’d like to
admit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The purpose of these blog posts is to give my girls a little
bit of guidance as they get older.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
suppose that I need to peel back the proverbial curtain of myself every once
and a while.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The last year has been rough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it’s the lockdown.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it’s the four-foot commute from my bed
to my desk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it’s the weight I’ve
put on or the reclusive lifestyle I found a way to pull off despite living in a
house with five people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Regardless of
what it is, I’ve been down, like Chrystal Pepsi down.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I’ve hidden it as best possible from the girls, but I know
there have been times when the mask slipped.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Maybe I should be more honest with them, but we’ve all dealt with so
much over the last year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In reality, the
last year has done a lot to all of us but the biggest thing it’s done to me is
to make me feel helpless, maybe a little weak.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“You can't wait until life isn't hard anymore for you to
decide to be happy”<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The person who said this quote is struggling with cancer and
was offered a 2% chance of survival.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
doesn’t look at the ninety-eight percent that stands in her way, she embraces
the strength of that 2%.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I guess life is all about that 2%. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I had dinner with my stepbrother over the weekend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He has an unrelentingly optimistic view of
me, one that sometimes feels both unearned and unattainable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While unearned, being with him recharges my
batteries.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I see a lot of younger me in
him and I like being able to offer pathways through the potholes that I so
frequently stepped in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One of the things
we discussed over dinner was gratitude.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Perhaps when life seems content to leave a bag of poo on
your porch maybe it’s fair to just not answer the doorbell.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it’s better to look at the Honor Roll
Avery made, or the soccer teams the girls all made. Maybe peek at the tough
half marathon Adrienne just ran and the growth she and you girls have done over
the last year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here, girls?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I suppose it’s as much for me as it is you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Happiness, in large part, is a decision.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is often easier to answer the doorbell and
its fecal package.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a doorbell, its
what’s expected of you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s easy to
spiral and think of the world as something that is conspiring against you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s simple to let it compound and blind you
to the good things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I know it’s easy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I’ve been doing it effortlessly for quite a little
while.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“You can't wait until life isn't hard anymore for you to
decide to be happy”<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Life will always be hard.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There will always be things that don’t go your way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There will always be loss and even
grief.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Life, like it or not, is
short.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Something I forget, more often
than I’d like to admit, it that life is too short to get caught up in the smelly
bag on the porch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-9829769213733834852021-05-28T08:37:00.000-06:002021-05-28T08:37:48.579-06:00Avery's Test of Mettle...or Medal<p>This is the last soccer post I will have for a little
while. The season is over as is
tournament weekend. In a previous post I
mentioned that we were one weekend away from a chance at an undefeated year,
for all three of the girls. That weekend
came and went and the girls remained undefeated. It was a fun season. Tournaments can be different. </p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Way different.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Tournaments tend to be a place for the best teams to
showcase their skills.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is a place
where an undefeated local team can get their doors kicked in on a bigger
stage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A place where dreams of grandeur
meet the nightmare of reality.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">My wife and I are well versed in this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In years past, Macy, my middle daughter
played for a team that was the deliverer of reality to unsuspecting teams.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My eldest, Avery, has always been the recipient.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Macy has a shelf full of trophies and medals from
tournaments.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These are not participation
awards.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They are bonafide articles of
battles won.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Avery has always looked longingly at that shelf.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgU80nlWoNM7g-nZ8D-k7EDmp6jsKcwzlwPg1JmWvTUopFe7YgpnGHY1QxmDGu55Cvjh0OJ4WDUaBBq6OSadQjQs1-fzhwIvcn6xKmyr-Szp1Qy804hBVwzFiojz46qTnGPc1l_0rFg75jU/s1269/avssoccer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1247" data-original-width="1269" height="196" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgU80nlWoNM7g-nZ8D-k7EDmp6jsKcwzlwPg1JmWvTUopFe7YgpnGHY1QxmDGu55Cvjh0OJ4WDUaBBq6OSadQjQs1-fzhwIvcn6xKmyr-Szp1Qy804hBVwzFiojz46qTnGPc1l_0rFg75jU/w200-h196/avssoccer.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>She had a great season and declared in the days leading up
to the tournament “I’m coming home with a medal”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Poor sweet Avery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her
teams, in the half decade she’s been going to tournaments, has won just one
single game.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I loved her attitude, but the odds were
stacked in the nightmare’s favor.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">My wife was out of town running a trail race in Moab (a
story for another post) so I knew it was going to be me to wipe the weekends
tears.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first game was against a team
that they had beat during the season. We had a feeling that they would win
their first game, but it would get dodgy after that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">We were right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On the
first day of the tourney, they won their first game, 3-0 and Avery played well
and had a goal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The second game that day
was tougher.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It took a late goal to earn
a tie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The girls looked a little out of
their depth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They may have been a little
lucky.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Avery was a bag of nerves that night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had hurt her foot and was concerned about
her ability to play at the level she wanted to. We stayed in a hotel with the
team and being surrounded by her friends on the team was a pressure relief
valve for her but her “taking a medal home no matter what” proclamation had
lost its luster a bit. There was some positive math for the team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If they won their next game they would make
the championship game, and more importantly, if they make the championship game
they get a medal, it may be silver, but it’s a medal none the less.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Avery was nervous when she woke up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We went down to breakfast and Avery sat quietly
eating a bit distracted.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We talked but
she was absent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She got dressed and we
made our way to the field.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I saw something I don’t see in Avery very often.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I watched her settle herself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her face went from “all nerves” to “business”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The game wasn’t five minutes old when Avery
scored.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I may be a little biased, or
completely so, but I believe that the early goal set the tone for the
game.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The team won 7-0.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The girls played great.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They
were in the championship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Avery would
get her medal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_80lD2H_zI8RiPSgD_aTrVT0s0v8m_CE3zs1TQd730fXAenJEGn3SqA2LKTeyMhAINlEgfSkFx59_qKuYiWmVc4QKQ0-AwiY9ZpbHYQRVF9G5VlUgKyjv-d9SYZhyphenhyphenadpbY32605VEki6-/s1440/trophy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="1080" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_80lD2H_zI8RiPSgD_aTrVT0s0v8m_CE3zs1TQd730fXAenJEGn3SqA2LKTeyMhAINlEgfSkFx59_qKuYiWmVc4QKQ0-AwiY9ZpbHYQRVF9G5VlUgKyjv-d9SYZhyphenhyphenadpbY32605VEki6-/w150-h200/trophy.jpg" width="150" /></a></div>That wasn’t enough for Avery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the championship, Avery would score the
team’s first goal again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They would go
on to win the trophy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Her smile was ear to ear, as was the rest of the team’s.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There was no clear MVP.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Everyone had played hard.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Everyone contributed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They had exceeded their own
expectations.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was great.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here, ladies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>First of all, set your own boundaries.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>If I were honest, I didn’t think you guys would bring home a medal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank goodness you didn’t think the way I did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Secondly, and most importantly, its about
rising to the moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There are moments
in your life that you either sink or you swim.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Moments that you will remember for the rest of your life, with joy when your succeed or with regret if you crumble a bit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It makes me proud that you made your
declaration and then backed it up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
proud of you, regardless.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In that I am
totally biased, but last weekend, you put an exclamation point on it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You played well, you were unselfish and you
were a leader. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would have been proud
if you didn’t win a game last weekend.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">But you did win a game last weekend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A bunch of ‘em.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, congratulations, sweetheart. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’ve got your medal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hope the achievement outshines that little
piece of metal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Probably won’t bet here’s
hoping!<o:p></o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-48419063902378337522021-05-15T08:36:00.004-06:002021-05-15T08:36:54.548-06:00One Day...Three Possible Championships...Lots Of Potential Tears<p> I was watching a YouTube video (do yourself a favor and type
Foo Fighters Kiss Guy into YouTube *some bad language for those faint of heart). A guy gets pulled out of the audience and
gets to play guitar with the band. Suffice
it to say, he does not disappoint. It
got me thinking. How do you perform when
your number is called? Do you rise to
the occasion or crumble under the pressure?</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Personally, I’ve done both.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I remember playing baseball and pitching on short notice with the
knowledge that if we won, we would go to the state tournament.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would pitch very well, and if my memories haven’t
been corrupted by time, had a couple of important hits as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I also remember playing in a softball
tournament years later that had I got a clutch hit with two outs in the bottom
of the last inning, we would have taken home the trophy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The lazy fly ball I hit insured the trophy
would go to the bad guys.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I suppose, in life, we all have these moments.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">This weekend, any or all of my daughters may see such a
moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The girls, and their spring
soccer teams have combined for a record of 19-0-2 going into the last weekend
of the season.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You would think, by the
grace of God, that at least one of them would have already secured their league
championship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No such luck.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All three girls need to win their remaining
game(s) to insure they win their respective divisions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is not really something we have needed concern
ourselves with in the past.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why is it we
have to have these pressures for all three kids?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe karma? Maybe lingering 2020 vibes?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who knows.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Whatever the reason, this weekend could be a nail biter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There could be high fives to give and cheeks
to dry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><br />I’m sure some would question my parenting when I say “I hope
its all celebrations or all tear wiping”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I dread two league championships and one second place finish, regardless
of which kid finishes second.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll brace
for the hate mail.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Full disclosure, I don’t put a ton of stock in winning and
losing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am definitely a “how you play
the game” fella.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think you push hard
and let the chips fall where they may. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Leave it all on the field and you’ll sleep
well regardless of the outcome.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I truly believe that.<o:p></o:p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD8Ok32JtnB4vQSFuNSXs-TDUZV_KFcxgElL-qu2IGU0OAC76qP8l2XVEB97HD-UbQC3Y_jzuTnnProGIaJZXoIR052w35hDlvD5OxCt1rWlUqA8k5oewpctSdfOpGpSMnDgZsJY-L382M/s1138/darby+ball.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1138" data-original-width="931" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD8Ok32JtnB4vQSFuNSXs-TDUZV_KFcxgElL-qu2IGU0OAC76qP8l2XVEB97HD-UbQC3Y_jzuTnnProGIaJZXoIR052w35hDlvD5OxCt1rWlUqA8k5oewpctSdfOpGpSMnDgZsJY-L382M/w164-h200/darby+ball.jpg" width="164" /></a></div><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I am also in the minority.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">All of the involved parties really want their respective first
place finishes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It looks like they will
have to run the table for all of them to be happy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fingers crossed.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here, little girls?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pretty straight forward.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is some chance your number will get called
this weekend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That there may be a moment
that you’ll remember for years to come that you either look back on fondly like
my pitching to go to state or that you will bemoan like my failures on the
softball field.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is a certainty
that your teams will need each of you to do your best to succeed. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">You’ve all put in the work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You’ve all practiced, listened and learned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is a philosophy to “let the training
take over”. I suppose that’s fine, but I subscribe to a different train of thought.
I believe you should live in the moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Enjoy it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you win, enjoy your
trophy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you lose, lick your wounds
and take your lesson.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Embrace the
competition and let it move your cleats. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Regardless of how you approach the game, remember one thing,
for your daddy’s sake, you all need to win or you all need to lose.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thanks in advance.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-80349594466335527712021-04-17T12:52:00.001-06:002021-04-17T12:52:43.046-06:00Avery, Assists and Avoiding the Spotlight<p> If 2020 taught us anything, its that sometimes wins can be
few and far between. Personally, I
haven’t been running as much as I should, I now have a four-foot commute to
work and my skin smells like gravy. I’ve
had worries about each of my children as well.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">But this isn’t that kind of post.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The last couple of weeks has had a few “wins” hanging around
in them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Jacobson girls are 5-0-1 on
the soccer field and they have looked good in doing so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This post is about my eldest daughter, Avery,
whose team has won their first two games and she has been a solid part of both
victories.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It should be said, that realistically, I don’t care all that
much if my kid’s teams win weekend to weekend so long as they try hard and have
fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While that is true, they seem to
have a little more fun when they win.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Avery has played on a split aged squad for the last three or
four seasons and until this year she was the younger half of the team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This fall was the first time she was among
the older group of players.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Those who know Avery know she is nothing if not shy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Being the older kid in the fall didn’t have
much of an affect on her game.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Despite
her being as big as the other kids for the first time in years, she shrugged
off any leadership role that was put on her shoulders.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">This spring has been a little different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is not to say that she is the best
player on the team or that she has suddenly become irreplaceable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What she has done is become a “go to” player
on her team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its little things like
hearing the coach yell to “find Avery” and get her the ball or having Avery put
against an opponent’s better players.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIK_8_FCawhGTslBxINHCCIPvcPV5_oS5Bk8GAuMeGritqGptLV4No4j1ZTWTqpwjFF6wcFrwYRQNPMCU6qBfk9DIXxYhXA2Xw3fcYjf054icsvxuOsriezxtqG_G9DD18JGY7HnK3Idz9/s876/soccer+avery.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="657" data-original-width="876" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIK_8_FCawhGTslBxINHCCIPvcPV5_oS5Bk8GAuMeGritqGptLV4No4j1ZTWTqpwjFF6wcFrwYRQNPMCU6qBfk9DIXxYhXA2Xw3fcYjf054icsvxuOsriezxtqG_G9DD18JGY7HnK3Idz9/w320-h240/soccer+avery.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />The first game of the spring, her Rapids team won 4 –
0.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Avery scored two goals, the first of
which she outran the defense and scored on the far side of the net.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She looked fast and shot accurately.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The second game, her team won 4 – 1.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had three assists.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not bad for a young lady who doesn’t give
herself credit for any of it. <o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The spotlight is an uncomfortable place for Avery, but maybe
she needs a little.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">So here it is, ladies, the point of this post.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s okay to have the eyes on you
occasionally, especially if you’ve earned it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Its not being boastful or too proud to acknowledge when you’ve done
well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its okay to give yourself a pat on
the back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not saying go full Brandi
Chastain after each goal, but yourself a little credit is just fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s not just for soccer either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Avery, your grades have really shined, and
your artwork has taken leaps. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">That goes for all of you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Take pride in what you do and then take pride when you are successful at
it. Hell, take pride if you’ve worked hard and it didn’t go your way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Take that from your marathon running,
hole-in-one hitting ol man.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(Jeremy, I
know you can add a 300 game to that list of accomplishments, but that’s for you
to tell your kid about).<o:p></o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-81762959825609759682021-02-01T09:01:00.001-07:002021-02-01T09:01:55.713-07:00Its Uggs or the Chefs. A Raider Fan's View of a Not So Super Sunday<p> </p><p class="MsoNormal">Sometimes these posts get a little light and sometimes I aim
to make people smile.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is not one of
those posts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You see, last Sunday both
the Kansas City Chiefs and Tom Brady were able to make it to next week’s Super
Bowl.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Sure, to some of you this is a fairly innocuous situation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Those who aren’t particularly bothered by
this aren’t fans of the Las Vegas Raiders.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">You see, as a Raiders fan, there is no good option for the
Super Bowl.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>First of all, there are the
hated Chefs making their second consecutive appearance in the big game.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the Raiders division, there are probably
no bigger rivals.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Unfortunately, for the
last, two decades-ish, The Raiders have been less than equal competition.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Last season, watching the Chefs raise the
Lombardi trophy, was akin to watching your kid sitting the bench while the opponent
hits a game winning home run.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was
stomach turning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMfiFda6cCNy2YUrNJrIMuizkD0P6p3bxgoIE1GlmBJWxvUXe4S8BNYZba6Z79BNr82Lw45Os-BEXLst5q6QKl-LmN-O9kpp_vYlfhGN7BD8fbWuTqzKEEiE_LGU1G2Uin9zpRKIu_zIRT/s1261/raiders.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1261" data-original-width="1080" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMfiFda6cCNy2YUrNJrIMuizkD0P6p3bxgoIE1GlmBJWxvUXe4S8BNYZba6Z79BNr82Lw45Os-BEXLst5q6QKl-LmN-O9kpp_vYlfhGN7BD8fbWuTqzKEEiE_LGU1G2Uin9zpRKIu_zIRT/w171-h200/raiders.jpg" width="171" /></a></div><br />Kansas City not only broke a decades long drought of Super
Bowl squalor, they also look primed to do the same thing over and over
again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They have the best quarterback in
the league, perhaps the best tight end and a ton of playmakers on offense.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s terrible.<o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Their opponent is the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am able to ignore the fact that the last
time the Raiders were in the Super Bowl it was against them and I can dismiss
the throttling the Raiders took.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The bigger issue is the quarterback of the Bucs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the off season the Buccaneers added Michigan
alum and all-around dung heap Tom Brady.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Speaking on a personal level, years ago Tom Brady replaced The New York
Yankees and intestinal flu as things that turn my gut.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">You see, January 19<sup>th</sup>, 2002 Tom Brady was the
quarterback of the New England Patriots.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He was nothing remarkable at the time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The legend of Tom Brady should have started a season later as the
Raiders seemed to have knocked Tommy Uggs out of the playoffs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Late in that game at Foxboro Field Charles
Woodson stripped Brady of the ball assuring the Raiders of a win.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But as the celebrating started, something
awful happened.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Something so terrible that
it was clear that the football gods had conspired against the Silver and
Black.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The officials got together
searching for a way to take the game from the Raiders.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They uncovered a little-known statute called
the “Tuck Rule”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The rule basically
states that any time the Raiders come close to any modicum of success the
officials are required to yell “Tuck You, Raiders” then take a win away from
them. Tom Brady went on to win the Super Bowl, the Raiders went on to a few
decades of obscurity.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Of note, I had tickets to that Super Bowl assuming the
Raiders went. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here girls?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Probably not a great one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let’s
try, if you aren’t cheatin’ you aren’t tryin’?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Nah, probably a bad lesson.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How
about this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Sometimes you’re going to
lose no matter what you do.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can live
with that one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Be it on the soccer field
or on your bike or in the classroom, despite your best efforts things are bound
to go against you sometimes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You may
fall on your bike or play a team you just can’t beat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You will be in a no-win situation here and
there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess that’ll have to be the
lesson.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Yeah, the Chiefs will win, or Tom Brady will win, and the
world will keep on spinning, I guess. In the meantime, we can hope that there is
a problem with the stadium’s plumbing and the game has to be cancelled.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A boy can dream.<o:p></o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-65341360258652989022021-01-20T12:05:00.002-07:002021-01-20T12:05:48.278-07:00Nice Ceiling You've Got There. Be a Shame if Something Happened to It<p> We kept our daughters out of school today. My wife and I value education, but today is a
rare day where there is nothing to be taught in the classroom that would
outweigh what they could learn at home. </p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">This morning, my wife put on a shirt bearing the Kamala
Harris quote “I’m Speaking” and gathered her daughters on the couch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had intermittent tears as Amy Klobuchar spoke
about the grit of the country and as Lady Gaga sang the national anthem.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">This is not to be political, but I need to rewind four years
to get the impact of what she is feeling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Four years ago, my wife had been sure that a glass ceiling was going to
be smashed and the first woman would hold the office of President of the United
States.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When Hillary Clinton lost,
Adrienne was devastated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Sure, she was upset about who had won.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But more specifically, she was upset about
what the loss said about our country.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
was crushed that a woman, regardless of how qualified she may be, could not get
the support to hold the country’s highest office.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She thought less of her country because she
felt she was worth less in it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was a
sentiment shared by my sister, my mother and I’m sure millions of women around
the country.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjY3pCQJW7yUy7D7XSa7thbpAMV28vRPCdpA7ULrHva0_Et_mds2a2qh5ER6C3dhyphenhyphenT9zVvdIkPWDSl2cW0D_1er82Hsuu9_nFhbqlsu1Ff3VI-KdN5dvLPUgjrsD0HGW5s9JsEA-QPBONHi/s913/VP+Day.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="547" data-original-width="913" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjY3pCQJW7yUy7D7XSa7thbpAMV28vRPCdpA7ULrHva0_Et_mds2a2qh5ER6C3dhyphenhyphenT9zVvdIkPWDSl2cW0D_1er82Hsuu9_nFhbqlsu1Ff3VI-KdN5dvLPUgjrsD0HGW5s9JsEA-QPBONHi/s320/VP+Day.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />Fast forward to today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My wife, sitting in her “I’m Speaking” shirt, hugging her little girls
and a little champagne celebrating something long overdue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She watched as Kamala Harris took her oath of
office and was sworn in as the Vice President of the United States.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A woman who represents a shattering of a
ceiling for my wife and kids, but that isn’t the only ceiling she left
broken.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Women of color, Asian American people
have reason to sit with their children and their champagne.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Twelve years ago, a ceiling was broken, and a large swath of
people got to feel like they finally had a seat at the big table, but half of our
country had never had that feeling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Today marks a day where we can be more honest with our daughters and say,
“you can be anything you want to be” without the asterix that we used to have
to apply to it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">In our house, today is the best day we’ve had in a
while.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of course, there have been great
days.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The girls got a trampoline for
Christmas for God’s sake, but today speaks to more about front flips.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Today is the first day in this country’s two-hundred-year
history that the fairer sex officially has a seat at the table.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">So, the lesson here my young ladies, is a big one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can do anything you want to in life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Full stop.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There are cracks in each of your ceilings that weren’t there
yesterday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It warms me to know that my
mother, my sister, my aunt, my mother-in-law, my sister-in-law and my niece got to see this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It warms me that my wife and daughters can
walk a little taller today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It warms me
to see that my country was able to give these things to my family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Enjoy your time on the couch today, girls, and pamper your
Mommy a little.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But tomorrow is a new
day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You have no excuse for not being
president in a few years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You have a lot
of work to do.<o:p></o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-21520645329620437732021-01-10T18:03:00.003-07:002021-01-10T18:04:08.043-07:00Judging By the Scale, I Ate A Wildebeest In 2020<p> Every year I post my New Year’s resolutions to my blog
site. I am one of the few people I know
that sees January one as a means of hitting a hard reset on myself and
generally do pretty well about accomplishing the goals I set for the new year. </p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Most years are not 2020.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I have had a lot of successes over the years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve replotted my career, run marathons and
one year I lost 20% of my body weight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">But none of those years were 2020.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Last year’s resolutions were easy enough to remember.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had a race I was going to run, I had weight
I wanted to lose, I had career goals I wanted to hit and I had a book that I
had done the research for that I wanted to write.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I trained for the race for six months, but
along came COVID.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Weight? COVID. Career?
COVID.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Book?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Oh, I’d love to blame COVID for that
one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I should have known if I was going to pull a hamstring, it
was going to be playing adult kickball in 2020.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I should have known if I were going to train for an out-of-state race in
2020 that it would get cancelled while I was packing for it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Didn’t get to miss a single training run.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Go to hell, 2020.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">So, generally speaking, I spend the days between Christmas
and New Year’s Eve going over my results and plotting next year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Lose weight?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I was ready to run a tough race in March, now I sweat when I use the
steps.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fail.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Run a race?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I can’t run to the mailbox.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Fail.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The book?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ugh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It felt like the disappointment I was feeling was one last
kick to the undercarriage from 2020.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9qVvh4EyX00rRxa9ovzE28CjkZaJnpz7h5vF9mk8ExRZf_1bqJFb8FbcgTE-lG7k_YV_c2AZiLFg27YYxbzul-L64waOO_5g4o-9pxCLSf6PjAMk3q1rXjJwDb73rB3JD3CdxSbbnwktW/s2048/fat+me.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9qVvh4EyX00rRxa9ovzE28CjkZaJnpz7h5vF9mk8ExRZf_1bqJFb8FbcgTE-lG7k_YV_c2AZiLFg27YYxbzul-L64waOO_5g4o-9pxCLSf6PjAMk3q1rXjJwDb73rB3JD3CdxSbbnwktW/w150-h200/fat+me.jpg" width="150" /></a></div><br />Frustration led me to skip writing my New Year’s post. Then
this week I had an unfortunate epiphany.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Why would I only post my year end post when it’s positive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I began to write the post and it felt
okay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A couple of nights ago I went to
bed with finishing it and posting in the morning butt lo an behold, I woke up
to a computer that decided that I shouldn’t post it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My writing was no where to be found.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I see what you’re doing 2020.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nicely played.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It wasn’t until last night that I decided that I should post
something.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess, here it is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My resolutions are ~drum roll~ the same as
last year (insert disappointing wa-wah sound).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Twenty pounds, a ton of miles and a book that needs written.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Here’s the thing, girlies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You can look at failure a few different ways.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It can beat you into submission or you can
stand up against it and try to rectify.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not
writing a post this year, at least to me, was akin to not setting
resolutions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Seemed like a great idea,
too!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But that wouldn’t make good
messaging to you little pumpkins, so I suppose I should stick with the
alternative.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Another thing, little ladies, is about giving yourself a
break.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>2020 was a weird year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It kept offering things that were difficult
to get around.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I failed on a bunch of
things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can beat yourself up about
it or forgive yourself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The trick is, to
forgive yourself but allow a little space for constructive criticism.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yeah, I put on some weight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A medium sized dog’s worth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I can drop it, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t run as much as I would have liked,
but I can sign up for a race and get trotting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I also didn’t write as much as I should have, and that I
have to come to grips with.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That one
falls square on me and I have to fix it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">One final note, I’ve loved spending the year with you guys
and mommy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s made 2020 a whole lot
more bearable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That being said, I want
to expand on it and start to try to harden some bonds with some more extended
family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Looking at you, Philadelphia.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like so many other things, you can beat
yourself up or fix it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll take fix it,
at least 70% of the time!<o:p></o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-29418445984638934152020-12-15T18:06:00.001-07:002021-04-17T12:55:01.497-06:00What a Difference a Year Makes<p>2020 has been a dumpster fire for most if us. For myself, I did a year of research for a
book in 2019 that I have only written about half of in 2020. I’ve gone from a runner whose weight was
going in the right direction to a guy who lacks the social queues to remind him
to shower and shave. </p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">For me, what a difference a year makes, around my waistline
specifically.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">But this isn’t about my fattitude.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It’s about my wife’s attitude.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Spoiler Alert: if you are of the mind that your Elf on the
Shelf departs every evening to the North Pole to inform the man in red about
your behavior, you may want to skip forward a paragraph or two. I’ll begin
again in 3….2….1….<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So last night, my
wife and I were doing our evening duty of finding a new vantage point for
Jingles, our elf to watch our children. I was distracted, probably by a sandwich
judging by my 2020 track record, so Adrienne wound up taking care of it
herself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I was on the couch when I heard giggling from upstairs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was Adrienne, pleased with the predicament
she had put Jingles in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It seems Jingles
had been captured by a host of other Christmas toys and was now taped to the
inside of a glass panel in a cabinet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It was funny, but that’s not what this is about either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">It was her effortless laugh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You see, for the last couple of year’s Adrienne has had a tough go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had committed herself to a career that
was perfectly stressful and completely thankless.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her health suffered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her relationships suffered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her self-worth suffered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was unhappy but like so many people she
equated who she was with what she did for a living.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was unhappy, for lack of a better term.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A few months ago she left the position unceremoniously.
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She added scared to the rest of the
things she was feeling.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">But then something funny happened.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She didn’t miss it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sure, there was the sense of impending doom
that comes along with losing a job during a pandemic and there were regrets of
friendships that were lost.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There were
no tears, no real anger and no laments.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Once the immediate pant-soiling fear of unemployed in a pandemic
subsided, what was left was someone who realized what she was sacrificing to
keep up with a job that had little interest in her succeeding herself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Fast forward to December.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Last year, I took care of the holidays pretty much by myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Christmas was just another day to Adrienne.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Something to endure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Phone calls from coworkers that seldom
realized boundaries asking for help despite the fact that it was Christmas Eve.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She smiled, sure, but it was forced and
transparent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2RDDuXfAwQ29JQbgjPK8yj-e0LzammpdcKufvJNa3b7895ZwNS567TOvPzikoqz2RqqWlb42abxxqnNkpNUXa-CyRgbO1Fyhrt3pVnDLvxtHQIii-33j6MGLTtlb1cPbx4bYa-kcA3vdc/s1440/adrienne.jpg" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="1080" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2RDDuXfAwQ29JQbgjPK8yj-e0LzammpdcKufvJNa3b7895ZwNS567TOvPzikoqz2RqqWlb42abxxqnNkpNUXa-CyRgbO1Fyhrt3pVnDLvxtHQIii-33j6MGLTtlb1cPbx4bYa-kcA3vdc/w150-h200/adrienne.jpg" width="150" /></a></div><br />This year, I live with a wife that couldn’t wait to cook Thanksgiving
dinner, do some Christmas shopping, wrap gifts or even tape an Elf in a
shelf.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What a difference a year makes.<o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here, girls?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Well, it’s an easier one to say than to live by.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A job is just a job but your health and your
family are forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All of you noticed a
change in mommy over those last few months.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Mommy listening to Christmas music and running and eating better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mommy and I always promise ourselves that if
our work starts getting in the way of our family we would need to
reevaluate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think this is the best
example we’ve had.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">You need to keep in mind what you are doing and what you are
trading to do it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes the tradeoff
is worthwhile, like giving up your evenings to soccer practice, and sometimes
its not, like giving up family time to watch YouTube.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Make a decision to do what betters you and don’t
punish yourself if it takes a while to make the decision.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Now, I’m going to make the decision to go downstairs and
spend time with my family instead it ticking away at this keyboard.</p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-46390460774624050772020-11-08T12:44:00.001-07:002020-11-09T09:34:00.795-07:00Uh Oh, Someone Left Some Ceiling On The Floor<p> There are times where this blog is tough to write, where
ideas don’t pour out or the subject matter is a little difficult.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Today is not one of those days.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Yesterday morning I had a planned run with my wife and some
friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My middle decided to tag along
and we headed off to the Colorado/ Wyoming border for some windy, high altitude
running.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was reluctant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hadn’t been training due to a hamstring
injury I endured playing, wait for it, kickball!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My God I’m getting old.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Needless to say, running at eight thousand feet,
undertrained and less than motivated was not a recipe for success.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was nervously drinking coffee and driving
north.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Macy had fallen asleep in the
back seat and Adrienne sat quiet, nervous as she hasn’t been trail running
either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The car was unusually
quiet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was considering the fact that I
hadn’t taken my allergy medication and that a few ibuprofens may have made my
back feel a little better for the run.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Did I mention that I am getting old?<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I reached down for my coffee and noticed Adrienne is a weird
position.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her phone was in her lap and
she was looking at the roof, crying. I’m an idiot for not immediately knowing
what had happened.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">“It’s over.” Adrienne said, “They called Pennsylvania.”<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I knew instantly what she was saying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This wasn’t a “trash the current administration”
thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t a “Go Biden”
thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Those tears were tears of joy
because a ceiling has been broken.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A
glass one that she thought was going to get broken four years ago. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">She woke up Macy and told her what had happened.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Kamala Harris had won the Vice
Presidency.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first woman to hold the
spot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A woman of color.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A black woman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An Asian woman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It shines a light for many people across this
nation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In my car, for my wife and
daughter, it was the ‘woman’ part that really struck home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXrGuVuOn-JxgIDQuc6qT8U4qe4GZzQUqvE9ejs-Kn73Uo4FmRmr8FI_yRXUgHgujj-pSDVuYONKAPH1PMTfM8miBElcpFoWhDa8u1Jezb7A-SG-tMpgvtKE7MhTJ1T94Gmfh5FeKZlzRS/s750/glass.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="750" height="209" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXrGuVuOn-JxgIDQuc6qT8U4qe4GZzQUqvE9ejs-Kn73Uo4FmRmr8FI_yRXUgHgujj-pSDVuYONKAPH1PMTfM8miBElcpFoWhDa8u1Jezb7A-SG-tMpgvtKE7MhTJ1T94Gmfh5FeKZlzRS/w209-h209/glass.jpg" width="209" /></a></div><br />Adrienne called my other two daughters, who didn’t get the news
firsthand as they did not want to get out of bed to run(decisions have consequences).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was beaming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The looming run had all but been
forgotten.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We parked and met our friends, who were having
a similar morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We talked gleefully
in a way that I don’t often do before a run like that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My wife made a friend at the bathroom of a
woman who was also grinning from ear to ear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I kept that joy in my heart for the first quarter of a mile
until I saw exactly what kind of run I had gotten myself into.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Side note: Jon, you are a bad friend and I
should not let myself get talked into your ideas.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>See you next weekend.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here girls?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This is a big one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can do
anything you want in life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The last election
left us all licking our wounds a little.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I remember you three questioning why our country would elect someone who
seemed “mean” and wouldn’t vote for a woman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I remember trying to explain that wasn’t really what happened, not
totally believing it myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember
my sister saying that our country would never elect a woman for national
office.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Those conversations are over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An overdue, two hundred-year-old wrong has
been righted a bit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A woman is in the White
House, at least in the West Wing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, to
those who begrudge the election, I get it, we all want our team to win, but for
a moment, just a moment, think of the women around you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Think of the people of color.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let them have their moment in the sun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">So, to my wife and daughters, to my mom and my mother in
law, to Lisa and Aunt Rosemary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Today is
a good day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There are plenty of
struggles in this country, to be sure, and plenty of work to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For one weekend, we should set that aside and
celebrate the election and what it means to so many marginalized people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to lie on the couch and ice
my legs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not getting any younger.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-81816471257448376792020-11-05T19:32:00.001-07:002020-11-05T19:34:03.417-07:00A Calm Within The Storm (with and assist from beer and football)<p> Election Day was a few days ago. There still isn’t a result. Like so many Americans, my family has been
locked to their televisions and Twitter accounts like there was a pandemic
keeping us home.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">No matter what side of the political spectrum you fall on, people
feel like the outcome of this election will shape this country for decades to
come.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps those people are right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In a moment of introspection yesterday
morning, I had a bit of an epiphany, that and a ringing hangover, but let’s
keep focused on the epiphany.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Here it is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t
change anything.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">That’s it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">No amount of nerves and Twitter scrolling will change
whatever outcome is headed our way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Full
stop.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">That’s not to say that I don’t care who wins.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I absolutely do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am someone who believes that the decision
made this week could affect my kids twenty years from now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sick of the craziness of the last four
years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But none of that will affect the
outcome.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I work from home and usually have the news on in the background,
which is the worst brand of ambient noise, but yesterday I listened to music
all day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was delightful. My wife and
I went out for a beer with a lovely couple last night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We sat for a couple of hours talking about
running, and football, and kids, and work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>What we didn’t talk about was the election.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">There are bigger things at play to be sure, but I now
realize that it doesn’t have to overtake my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its freeing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Today I listened to music from all over the world while I worked.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I never tuned into the election.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tonight, I intend to watch football and hang
out with my kids with full knowledge that the country is on fire in more ways
than one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I’m hoping that I wake up in the morning and its, at least
for the most part, over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m hoping we
as a country learn to agree to disagree better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m hoping that there is a return to dialogue and decorum. I’m praying
for normalcy. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Finally, I am hoping that my
wife gets to tell my girls that a woman is the Vice President of the United
States.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfuRULntlOJ3XoTn2b0P9I7q9qq8qJI76pz_2PqgHtSrX26VOMfPSwB18fTMtJBhDPclITDmLQ_lplqnDLaQVnT21Hhl1CiXn98cPl2eFoGedyO2_wXS40RB2BtEtM8rWuYbJoNZlw2Anj/s692/election.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="427" data-original-width="692" height="184" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfuRULntlOJ3XoTn2b0P9I7q9qq8qJI76pz_2PqgHtSrX26VOMfPSwB18fTMtJBhDPclITDmLQ_lplqnDLaQVnT21Hhl1CiXn98cPl2eFoGedyO2_wXS40RB2BtEtM8rWuYbJoNZlw2Anj/w300-h184/election.PNG" width="300" /></a></div><p class="MsoNormal">The lesson here girls?
Pretty simple, actually. Its
important to stand up for what you believe in.
Its important to fight the good fight.
Its also important to know what you can and cannot control. I don’t think it’s a secret that I am not a
supporter of the current administration.
Girls, you know exactly how I feel about it. But sitting around wringing my hands and
cursing at the television won’t change anything. The fact is that there is a bigger picture to
me. Since you girls have been walking
the earth there have been three women on major presidential tickets. I’d just as soon as not have them go 0 for 3
in those elections. </p><o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">So, girls, America is ready to have a woman run it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If not now, soon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if not soon, then maybe one of you will
have to do it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now, excuse me, I need to
generate another stinging hangover so I can keep this chipper outlook.</p>chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-24057891632991322642020-07-07T10:37:00.002-06:002020-07-07T10:37:35.010-06:00So, It Just Comes in Threes, Right?<p class="MsoNormal">Macy had a week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
had an absolutely craptastic, shit-fest of a week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was one of those weeks that through ten-year-old
eyes feels like being knocked down and then kicked and kicked.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Macy found out that one of her best friends was moving out
of state.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was really weighing on her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She tried to keep a stiff upper lip, but
truth be told, this friend encapsulated what Macy thinks of as ‘cool’.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I remember kids like her when I was young.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A kid that always knew what was cool before
the rest of us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were the ones that
pushed boundaries.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was like they had
a special report on ‘hip’ that I was never privy to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Macy’s friend shaved the side of her head and always had a different
hue hinted in her blonde locks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She is a
paddleboarder, a skateboarder and was among the first in her grade to have a
cell phone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Macy couldn’t help but look
up to her and I think got a little star-struck when her admiration was returned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were a good pair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I get why Macy was upset.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">That week, Macy also had soccer tryouts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t merely a formality, but it was close.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Macy’s team was very good, and I could hardly
see the league disbanding them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Rapids
had informed us that they were trying to limit tryouts due to Covid, but we
were later informed that, in fact, all three of our girls needed to tryout for
their individual teams.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Avery, my eldest
had the first tryout.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
struggled.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In an unfortunate turn of
events, due to scheduling, all three girls had to sit and wait for the others
to complete their tryouts. Avery was in near tears when her tryout was
over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t think it went as bad as
she did, but I didn’t love her odds either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Then it was Darby’s turn.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>More often than not, my youngest didn’t seem to realize that soccer is a
competition.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I assumed that she would A)
not make a competitive team or B) care.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She had a fair tryout and then immediately left the field to play with
her puppy without a thought of making a team.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Macy went last.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her
tryout was about an hour.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the spirit
of transparency, she was slow to start.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>After the first five or ten minutes, old Macy came out and I was very
comfortable with her performance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
worried about Avery and Darby, but Macy?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Not so much.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Best laid plans of mice and men.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Avery would find out that night that she had, in fact, made
the team she wanted to make as had a few of her close friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was overjoyed and proud of herself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We were told that it may be up to 48 hours
before we heard results, so we were thrilled to get early notification.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Darby and Macy would have to wait….and wait….and wait.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They waited long enough that the other local organization’s
tryouts came and went.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No coincidence,
me thinks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The evening after the other
organization’s tryouts we got a phone call.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Darby had made her team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Macy had
not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjV-JUta57S4SFacdRp2XRTH8IJRKKDLA6q9ONha6ZHm29Nw9D_-qePgqGNFuWqz-eo__L9RuWVrhmU4jPIeR_KS5pcNSUGdmOE1iRfBny6t_tin23_gd-0wNKhwy5PFYkQSkT4EvAkNj58/s640/macy+threes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="640" data-original-width="480" height="256" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjV-JUta57S4SFacdRp2XRTH8IJRKKDLA6q9ONha6ZHm29Nw9D_-qePgqGNFuWqz-eo__L9RuWVrhmU4jPIeR_KS5pcNSUGdmOE1iRfBny6t_tin23_gd-0wNKhwy5PFYkQSkT4EvAkNj58/w192-h256/macy+threes.jpg" width="192" /></a></div>We were floored.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Someone somewhere had made a mistake.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Macy had long thought that her coach had a problem with her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I dreaded to think that the ten-year-old may
have been right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The exponential problem
was that one of her best friends was moving and many of her other friends were
on the team she was just cut from.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The next day was a morose one around our house.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Macy was trying to get a hold of her friend
before she moved but for a few days she was sent straight to voicemail.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My suspicion is that they already moved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We tried to keep her spirits up, but she
decided to take a nap.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">She was only upstairs for a couple of minutes before she
came down, her hands cupped holding something.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Her tears were fresh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">What she held was her hamster.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t know why, but the little guy had passed
away sometime that morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ham Solo was
a good hamster, short of the fact that he picked the worst week possible to
shed his mortal coil.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The look that was on Macy’s face was one I’ve never seen in
one of my kids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was resignation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was helplessness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was upset to find out that her friend was
moving.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was crushed to find out that
she hadn’t made her soccer team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The hamster
left her defeated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She asked if we could
go for a car ride.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">We took a ride around a mountain lake a few miles from our
house. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She said that she was feeling
something she hadn’t felt before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That
she felt like she was waiting for the next thing to happen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like something was stepping on her not
letting her catch her breath.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I understood. For a ten-year-old, that’s a lot to deal
with.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">There is a lesson here, girlies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yeah, it was a bad week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>By hook or by crook the world conspired against Macy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had no control over her friend moving or
her hamster dying, and truth be told, I don’t think she had a ton of control
over soccer either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s how you deal
with it, and Macy dealt with it great.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">My wife was able to talk to someone at the Arsenal soccer
office and got her a one-on-one tryout.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
killed it. The coach was floored by her performance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He said that he couldn’t believe that the
Rapids would have let her go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She wound
up making a team a level up than the one she was discarded from.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She let us know that she would use this
season to get better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She would make her
old team next time around.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She may, she
may not, but I love her pulling herself up and saying so. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">We also got her a new hamster as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Derp Vader isn’t quite the pet that Ham Solo was
but he’s working on it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></p><br />chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-72343512453187461042020-06-21T11:11:00.000-06:002020-06-21T11:13:47.408-06:00My Dad wasn't a Great Golfer, But That's Okay<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
My dad was a crappy golfer. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I spent round after round with him playing golf.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I took golf vacations with him. He never
really got better.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I tried to help him. It was about weight transfer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was that he lifted his front foot and was inconsistent
on his swing plane.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>None of it really
stuck.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But he kept plugging along.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was actually during a golf trip in Florida where he told
my brother and me about his diagnosis.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He then called my sister and told her as well leaving my brother and me
to discuss the ramifications of what we just heard over beers in an open-air
sports bar.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Dad seemed relatively cavalier about it when he told us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He said that the brand of cancer that he had
was very curable and that he would be fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He talked to my sister and came back to the table.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was more upset after talking to her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A bit of the confidence faded from him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My sister had that affect on him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This isn’t about my dad’s cancer diagnosis.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its about golf and my father’s inability to
hit a golf ball consistently.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dad took
lessons and made some strides, but muscle memory would take over and his bad
swing would return.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was a very strong,
healthy guy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He lifted weights and ran daily.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t a physical issue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like all of us, bad habits overruled his good
ones as it related to his golf game.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I suppose the questions becomes, “yeah, he wasn’t a great
golfer, why write about it on Father’s Day?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8OtP0FFAJf7RGjT0Ipp-oRrxi465XsrfL3X1dOBhdDY1MPJqaUkz7A7xikCUtp2vlA6m5Y6A9ZMM_VITDzLADoH5DJgHQWU7HQ-VFSoLc8Kgb_I1HQeUPY36aAxwsNuhRq_6g5xtOoeLg/s1600/dad+golf.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="540" data-original-width="720" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8OtP0FFAJf7RGjT0Ipp-oRrxi465XsrfL3X1dOBhdDY1MPJqaUkz7A7xikCUtp2vlA6m5Y6A9ZMM_VITDzLADoH5DJgHQWU7HQ-VFSoLc8Kgb_I1HQeUPY36aAxwsNuhRq_6g5xtOoeLg/s320/dad+golf.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Here you go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dad was
a bad golfer but kept going because it was a means of meeting his sons where
they were.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He took time and absorbed
great expense because it gave him a chance to hang out with his kids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Frankly, those were some of the best times
with Dad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I’ve detailed before, in my
younger years we didn’t always get along.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He was very structured and very business minded.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tended to be a free thinker and ideological.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But on the golf course all of that faded away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We were all relaxed and funny.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was literally my favorite times with him.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I sense it’s why he played fantasy football as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Every year he stated how little research he
had done and leaned heavily on my brother and me for advice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That meant phone calls for the entirety of
the season.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Phone calls with no
politics, no history, no arguments. Just football.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My sister had this same bond with him as it came to running
and travel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He understood her drive to
run long distances long before anyone else in the family did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would think that I’m not stepping on her
toes here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember her saying last
year that the thing she missed most about dad is her post race phone calls to
him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
He was a great runner.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He was a crappy golfer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He did
both to meet his kids where they were.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The lesson here, little ladies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Grandpa was a lot of things; a great golfer was
not one of them, but a proud guy was.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
was a proud guy but was willing to set that aside to golf with his kids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, while we may not have seen eye to eye
when I was younger, my dad made strides in his later years of bridging any gaps
we had.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To my credit, I made my own
moves to meet him in the middle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Obviously, neither of us were completely innocent all of those years
ago.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It took me a long time to figure out the golf part of all of
this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I couldn’t figure out why he was
always the one proposing golf.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think I’ve
got it now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He didn’t need to be good at
golf to enjoy the time together. I think he enjoyed his kids most when we all
let our guards down and the times we did that best was when we were running, or
traveling, or drafting Ryan Leaf in fantasy football or even skulling a
7-iron.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So, Happy Father’s Day, Dad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Hopefully, you’re up there hittin’ them straight, or at least visiting
the 19<sup>th</sup> hole.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<br />chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-84108269033755015602020-06-08T10:56:00.002-06:002020-06-08T10:57:16.662-06:005'10" Pudgy Guy Just Trying To Help - A Working Title<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: center;">
<i>Differences are not intended to separate, to alienate. We
are different precisely in order to realize our need of one another.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>~ Desmond Tutu</i></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I don’t generally write posts in a back to back fashion but
the events of the last week spurred something in me and for the parent, husband,
friend and writer in me, I have a few words to say.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Here’s the thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
have consciously raised my children to be more than ‘tolerant’ of other’s
differences.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To me, to be tolerant is to
accept someone else’s flaws and love them anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For example, my wife is a fan of the Denver
Broncos.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sure, its unbecoming but I
tolerate it because I love the rest of her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I think that saying you are tolerant of someone’s gender, or race, or
orientation or anything else that makes them different than yourself is saying
that you love them despite being a woman or gay or black.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It shouldn’t be ‘despite’ it should be ‘and’.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love you AND you’re gay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love you AND you’re Jewish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love you DESPITE you being a Bronco fan. See?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Up until this week I thought I had done a good job I this
regard. On some level I have, but it just isn’t enough.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I can give examples for each of my kids and how they deal
with people different than them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My eldest
had an African American friend in grade school (still does, but that’s not the
point).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We wanted to invite her to a
birthday party, but Avery didn’t know her last name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had her describe her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Curly hair, tall, brown eyes, really nice”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tons of descriptors, just not the color of
her skin.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In talking to her about it, we
found that she didn’t use that as a descriptor because she simply didn’t
notice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She knew she was black, she just
didn’t think of it as something different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The girls go to school with kids from every walk of life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I hear their names I generally can guess
about where their families stem from.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The kids just don’t care. Frankly, the only time we hear any of the kids
talking about someone’s nationality in any capacity is the “Immigrant Program”
where the kids dress up in their heritage's traditional garb.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Side note, all three of my kids chose their
mother’s German side completely ignoring my way more fun Irish side.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In a previous post I talked about my youngest realizing that
my next-door neighbors were a lesbian couple.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Her question about it was not about their relationship or the fact that
they were both girls. It was whether or not their dogs are allowed to get married.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From the mouths of babes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My kids are fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>They simply judge people for how they make them feel.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Here’s the rub.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s
not okay just to fail to notice our differences anymore.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I recently read a book featuring Desmond Tutu
and the Dalai Lama.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was moved by the
simplicity of their thoughts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tutu said,
<o:p></o:p></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i>“To be neutral in a situation of injustice is to have
chosen sides already. It is to support the status quo.”</i></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And that’s it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Too
much sitting on the sidelines for most of us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Too much for me, anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve watched
my mother and my wife and my sister protest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve seen my aunt write and call her senator.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My sister actively campaigned for several
candidates she supported. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>None of that
may seem like a lot, but they’ve done something.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were moved enough for change to go out
and try to extract it themselves.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I need to show my
daughters that I can do more as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I haven’t fleshed it out yet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Truth be told, the images of protesters being tear gassed in D.C. are
still all jumbly in my stomach.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If the
last week has made me feel naïve about the world, the situation in our nation's capital made me angry. I'm open to suggestions.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m sure I will return to this subject over and over in my mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I need to talk to my kids about this week, so
that by itself will keep it fresh in my mind for the time being.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Normally, I end these things with a lesson
for the girlies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Today I’ll close with
another quote, this time from the Dalai Lama,</div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i>"The challenge today is to convince people of the value of
truth, honesty, compassion and a concern for others."</i></blockquote>
I'll leave it at this. If you need it, my phone, my house, my shoulder are all safe places. If you're in need of a friend, you've got one. As a 5'10" slightly pudgy, slightly balding white guy I cannot speak to your experience, but I can offer you a beer or a joke or an ear.<br />
<br />chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-80128290862155794252020-06-01T10:54:00.002-06:002020-06-01T10:54:25.939-06:00Love in the Time Cononavirus<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’ve been noticing a ton of complaining lately.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Most if it has been of the “making me wear a
mask is infringing on my rights” or “you not wearing a mask is infringing on
mine” variety.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For today’s purposes, I
don’t particularly care what side of that line that you, dear reader, fall
on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is not the complaining that is concerning
me.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The complaining I’m referring to is coming from inside the
house.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My kids have been troopers
through this whole thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They’ve done their
schoolwork and helped around the house from time to time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They’ve not fought as much as they did
pre-virus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They seem to understand that
they are in a much better situation than a lot of other people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Their parents haven’t been catastrophically financially
ruined by the stay at home order.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> We haven't had to buy bigger pants, put 'Keep Out!' signs on our doors or break up any fist fights. </span>We are
a family that genuinely gets along.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We
are, for the most part, happy and healthy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The last week or so, there have been chinks in their
armor. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It started with Darby, my youngest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She has become more secluded when
allowed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her base instinct lately seems
to be to sneak off to watch TV or play on someone’s phone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Next was Macy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
has always been the most prone to run hot and cold.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The last few weeks, lots of hot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fire breathing hot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Angry hot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Not very cool.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Finally, Avery, my eldest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She has just dropped.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her mood
has gone into the proverbial shitter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To
her defense, she’s missed the last months of her 7<sup>th</sup> grade year, her
soccer season and was trapped in her house during her 13<sup>th</sup>
birthday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She has every reason to be
down in the mush, I’m just not that great at letting her wallow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyone who knows us knows that she’s my
little buddy and it kills me to see her, or my other kids, feeling low.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My wife has been less affected, job wise, than I have. I am
better able to shift my hours around. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It
has left me feeling a little more responsible for my kid’s school, their free
time and, in some ways, their mental state.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My wife keeps the lights on, I keep the boogie man away, so to
speak.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I needed to act.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Anyone who knows me personally knows that I am a caring dad
but a weird hybrid of impulsive and strict.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This situation would be no different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I decided that maybe what the kids were lacking was a schedule.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The answer to their boredom?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Clearly its assigning them a bunch of duties
and a limited time to get them done! <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Hey kids, you bored?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Here’s War and Peace.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Get me a
report on it as soon as you’re done.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Okay, maybe it wasn’t that bad but the rules were an hour
and a half a day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Math, reading, music
and phys ed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Half hour each, math and
reading being daily.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its not monstrous,
but the kids definitely didn’t see it as a cure for boredom either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What they didn’t know is that I had plans for
when they got finished with their chores*.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>*Chores-crap they should be doing anyway so they become
better people and their brains don’t turn to porridge.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The result was interesting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>They complained at first, but they started gravitating towards it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll be dipped, they seem to appreciate the
normalcy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe I’m being overly
generous, but they get it done daily, even proudly checking off their lists.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4NSfzSwR4axLusTc6LB0xhfH01jp_jcBm5bofefOnokfTPmK9bDV5Sp33Jw56bI7cshoGV7D_DBupJTJl-tgTA6vPgfyWHZmCSJIaA6BQ2Vf5cP-_g5NBmrVzhSbvxMwel3bUhRW_qTGd/s1600/kayak.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4NSfzSwR4axLusTc6LB0xhfH01jp_jcBm5bofefOnokfTPmK9bDV5Sp33Jw56bI7cshoGV7D_DBupJTJl-tgTA6vPgfyWHZmCSJIaA6BQ2Vf5cP-_g5NBmrVzhSbvxMwel3bUhRW_qTGd/s200/kayak.jpg" width="150" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Rewarding them, during the time of the virus is a different
animal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Finding fun that is also
socially distant isn’t quite as easy as it sounds.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So far we’ve gone fishing, kayaking, bike
rides, the drive-in movie theater (total life saver) and done more in our back
yard than we have done in years, if ever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The lesson here little ladies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This one’s about mommy and me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have found a ton of fun and got a ton
accomplished.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’ve struck a balance.
Our house is cleaner, we’ve built a new deck, we’ve run more miles and done
more workouts than before the virus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’ve
done more as a family during this time as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We’ve played games and done puzzles and swam and watched movies and on
and on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Naysayers would say “Of course you’ve done all of this
stuff.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You are stuck at home”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Maybe, but I think more specifically, we’ve made the
time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’ve made it a priority because
of how different the world seems.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It
could have been this way all along, it just took a decision to make it so.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I wholly believe that when my girls look back at this time,
they will look back fondly (assuming our family and friends don’t get sick or
lose jobs).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hopefully, it will be a time
where they remember further embracing the outdoors and learned to play the
piano.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A time when they mastered their
math and read a great book series.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Hopefully, it’s a time where our family bonds grew stronger and we
laughed and played more than we ever have.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Now, fun and games aside little ladies, you have an hour and
a half of stuff to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Get you butts in
gear.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-64896690586658618442020-04-21T14:03:00.002-06:002020-04-22T10:50:10.758-06:00Avery: The Quarenteenager<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Today is going to be a rough one for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have a daughter, my oldest daughter Avery,
turning thirteen today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This is tough for a variety of reasons, not the least of which
is that we are locked in our house and unable to give her the great “so you’re
a teenager now” birthday party.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I want,
for the purposes of this post, to ignore that little part of this whole
birthday and focus on the “my little girl is fast becoming a little lady” part
of it.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
On her birthdays, Avery likes to ask me about the day she
was born.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was truly a comedy of
errors and I think it makes her feel special that after all of the things that
went wrong on that day, we still decided to dip our foot back in the pool and have
her sisters.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When Adrienne was very pregnant with Avery, we went to the doctor
for what was supposed to be a well-visit at our doctor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Clearly, everything wasn’t well as our doctor
instructed us to get to the hospital stat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>To my experience, when a doctor says “stat” it’s almost never good
news.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s never “you have a clean bill
of health. Go get yourself a sammich stat”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>As it turns out, we went from planning for the birth of our first
daughter to inducing delivery in the course of just a few hours.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For the sake of an expediency that Avery didn’t afford us, it
will suffice to say that Avery birth required hours of natural delivery and
then a C-section. My wife often claims that she gave birth twice in the same night without the benefit of twins.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The doctor thought she may have nicked
Adrienne’s bladder during delivery and would have to explore that problem while
I sat in a dark room for a little girl who was ready for mom to feed her for an
hour and a half and she didn't hesitate to let me know it. There's the fact that her little feet were so small that her sensor
anklet kept slipping off making the hospitals “kidnapping alarm” go off
constantly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was an extra long stay at
the hospital and days without sleep.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was a crash course in parenting that all parents go though.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was an unsettling beginning to a wonderful
adventure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If I were to use one work to describe Avery, that word would
be ‘kind’.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her default setting is to
think of others before herself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe that’s
something that every parent thinks of their own children but with Avery, it’s
so incredibly accurate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Over the years I’ve watched Avery take her birthday money to
buy treats for her sisters, her friends and her cousins.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She is appreciative and generous.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She doesn’t judge people based on anything besides
how they make her feel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Popularity and other
external factors just don’t matter to her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve watched birthday after birthday where Avery invites kids from every
avenue of her life and try to get all of them to get along, regardless of their
interests.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She can’t understand that simply
being nice isn’t enough for everyone to be besties.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I envy that part of her as it’s something I
have truly lost.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If she is entitled to a special dinner, or gets
to choose a movie, she asks those around her what they want and makes her
decision based on that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hell, for her
thirteenth birthday dinner she decided the menu almost exclusively on what her
sisters like to eat while watching movies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Incidentally, she didn’t take me into account when she chose a menu of
cheese sticks, pizza rolls and little smokies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Long story short, she is a special kid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My favorite time with her was shortly after
her sister, Macy, was born.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Macy, for a long
time, didn’t see the value in anyone who couldn’t produce milk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In our little household, that eliminated Avery
and me from any real utility.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What that meant is that Avery and I had to fend for
ourselves in large part.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>During those
months, Avery became my little buddy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We
became inseparable, and that is something that has continued for the decade
since.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The lesson here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>None
really. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just want to celebrate a
wonderful little lady who will always be my little girl and my little
buddy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am proud of the woman you are
becoming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It astonishes me that someone
as good as you came from my parenting, clearly you leaned heavily on your
mother in that department.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve said to
you dozens of times, “I can be your friend and I can be your Dad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll always pick Dad first, but my favorite
times is when I can be both.”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, Avery,
I can tell you, that for the last thirteen years, I been both more often than
not.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Now, go get your homework done and clean your room, just
because you’re becoming a teenager in the middle of a pandemic doesn’t mean I
have to turn off being dad!<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
***</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFw4uJSP9g6NPE5oqMLWdM5MAEb4cEVqIR0ILo4D_tH_zCZ0xDXayKnnntf3CK9D8HfczAez77pIrMjKy8pAvEnclwSV533klf4o4d_zMQZoDSOtaeathPAYOJPlA5K6qwkAQCTt0kuzCl/s1600/Parade.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="455" data-original-width="713" height="127" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFw4uJSP9g6NPE5oqMLWdM5MAEb4cEVqIR0ILo4D_tH_zCZ0xDXayKnnntf3CK9D8HfczAez77pIrMjKy8pAvEnclwSV533klf4o4d_zMQZoDSOtaeathPAYOJPlA5K6qwkAQCTt0kuzCl/s200/Parade.PNG" width="200" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I have an addition to this post today. I want to say a giant thank you to those of you that took the time out of your day to do a drive-by happy birthday for Avery. Seeing friends and family pour past the house was a surprise to her and the numbers were a surprise to me. It was something generally reserved for YouTube. We did everything we could for her but the fact that so many people swung by and yelled their warm wishes her way meant more than anything we could have boxed and wrapped in pretty paper. </div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
She said it was the best day of her life. </div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
And she's been to Disney.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
You people did that for her. Thank you.</div>
</div>
chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-58793935948668919272020-04-09T10:27:00.001-06:002020-04-09T10:56:22.711-06:00350,000 Scovilles Of Fun - Also, I'm a Terrible Person<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Okay, boredom has set in on some level.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of course, we spend our mornings doing
homework and regular, grown-up style work, and we run and ride bikes and play,
but we were looking for something new.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Something fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Something
inspirational. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps something
dangerous that didn’t involve standing closer than six feet to someone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It took us days of thumb twiddling to come up with an
activity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then, from the far side of the
internet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From deep inside the YouTube
machine came a show called Hot Ones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Billed as a show with “hot questions and even hotter wings”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The features celebrity guests eating
progressively hotter wings while answering questions asked by the host/ demon
of hot foods, Sean Evans.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Now, I’ve long claimed to be a terrible salesperson, but I
somehow convinced my two oldest children that filming our own version of the
show would be a perfect way to pass the time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My oldest was a reluctant participant, but my middle, Macy, grabbed onto
the idea the like a dog to a bone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
insisted on show quality sauces.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
insisted on difficult questions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hell, she
was the one that insisted on multiple camera angles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Things really started falling into place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had a few sauces already.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the limited shopping we were allowed to do
we were able to find a couple of more.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We weren’t able to find “Da Bomb” or “Blair’s Mega Death Sauce” like the
show, but we put up a reputable showing with one sauce boasting 100,000 Scoville
units (the heat measure of a pepper – a jalapeno coming in around 2500 units)
and our hottest sauce being between 350,000 and 400,000 Scoville units.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We even received an ad from a wing shop the
morning of the contest saying they would deliver us wings to our front
door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That was more than coincidence, I
thought, the angels were smiling on us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Smiling
on us for at least for a while. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We ordered the wings, we set up three different cameras, I
wrote questions for the girls as I would be playing the host and we staged the
sauces and five wings on the table for each of us.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was show time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Wing one went down for everyone easy enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wing two was Siracha.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No problem.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Child’s play. Three was where it started getting interesting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was an El Yucateca XXXtra Hot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It sat around 11,000 Scolvilles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My eldest began having serious doubts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was hotter than she was planning on eating.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was nothing compared to what was
coming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The questions were coming as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“If you had to kiss a boy, I mean you had to,
who would it be?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>and “You could go to
space camp or get an iPhone X, which would you take?” (Thank Christmas they
both took space camp)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Next up was this Habanero/Orange/Garlic monstrosity that
even had me nervous.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We each took the wing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We bit down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nothing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sweetness sure, but no heat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then another bite.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We all smiled.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Pffft, what’s the big deal?” we each thought
to ourselves and then with each other aloud.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Then we realized our mistake.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
orange was a Trojan horse.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The sweetness
gave way to what could be described as a penny dipped in battery acid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had all made a tremendous mistake taking
another bite.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The second bite offered
the same orange sweetness but this time it was paired with the heat of the
first bite.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not just unpleasant in
flavor, it was also the realization that food may never taste the same again
considering the damage we had done to our tongues.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Then the questions, “Getting a red card in a championship
game but your team still wins or score three goals but your team loses” and “you
can have any pet you’d want but you’d have to give up one of your own pets,
would you?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Turns out both would take
the red card and still win, but one would need a new tank in the back yard for
her new narwhal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sorry Obi.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We all looked apprehensively at the final wing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>350,000 Scoville units staring straight at
us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wasn’t particularly nervous about
the previous wings.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The smell of this
one completely cleared my sinuses. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t
know if it was the wings they had already eaten, the boyfriend related questions
or the anticipation of this final super spicy wings, but they were both
sweating like, well, the oldest profession in a place of worship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
My wife shook her head at the table full of idiots as we bit
down into the final wing. I think, and I say ‘think’, as things became a little
rushed with that last wing, I think it made for good camera.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This wasn’t a ‘creeper’ like wing four.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This one was right up in your face.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It made its intentions known quickly and with
rigorous authority.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My oldest, Avery,
drank one glass of milk, then another, with the ability generally reserved for
fraternity parties.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Macy tried to waive
air into her mouth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t know that
move was used in real life, Tom & Jerry, for sure, but not in the
flesh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Myself, I tried to keep up a
stiff veneer, a move I learned from the show our dumbassery (sp?) was based on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He does a much better job.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My face was melting when I asked my last question.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Who is your favorite, Mommy or Daddy?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The lesson here girls?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Its about fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Was it a bit risky
eating things that spicy?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Did we all regret it at the time and again in
the morning when our home seemed short three bidets?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Absolutely.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Was it the most fun we’ve had during the stay-at-home order?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yeah, probably.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I guess, every once in a while you should truly embrace the
absurd.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do something profoundly stupid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Throw caution to the wind in search of a
great time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its how adults become kids
again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Children have these wonderful
imaginations that we tend to squash as we get tubby and gray.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We adults need to manifest our imaginations
from time to time and the easiest way to do it is through rugged acts of
idiocy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You know how I call the Wild
West Relay the dumbest fun thing you can do?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Rugged idiocy, get it?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So, as you get older, embrace the absurd, to a point.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you aren’t going to hurt anyone, and only
slightly hurt yourself, go nuts!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Also, the answer to the last question was unacceptable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just because I fed you 350,000 Scovilles of
fun doesn’t mean you get to pick Mommy as your favorite.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Also, hope you're feeling better @seanseaevans</div>
<br />chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-509130683119888943.post-75994618808254876182020-04-05T11:06:00.000-06:002020-04-05T11:06:04.522-06:00The Tale of the Woefully Unqualified Teacher/Chef/Maid<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
This week was the toughest our household has had it since
this whole thing started.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not been
awful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Certainly, people have it a lot
worse, but this was a tough week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Perhaps I should offer a touch of back story for
clarity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My wife and I are both still
working.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are fortunate in that
regard.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It would be more honest to say
that my wife is busier than I can ever remember her being.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She wakes up earlier and goes to bed later
than ever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She has about one hundred
fifty people in her office and they all, in some capacity, rely on her to help
them through this crisis.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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I suppose that’s where the story begins.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While she is working from home, she is always
working.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On Friday, she was in one conference
or another from 8:30 in the morning until 4:00.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That doesn’t even include her more traditional work duties of recruiting
and retention for the office.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
I, on the other hand, can work but have definitely seen my
workload decrease.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s probably a
good thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You see, I’ve expanded some
existing roles and taken on some new ones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I am now a teacher, who, in most classrooms, would be seen as the “cool
teacher”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am the entertainment
director of a landlocked cruise ship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
am a chef, a maid, a counselor and then I am a dad and when there’s time, a
husband.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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I have learned to navigate dozens of educational websites who
were clearly built by the lowest bidder.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve committed to several virtual happy hours.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve cooked meals with all of my
children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve played board games, video
games and done enough crafts to make your mind bleed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have somehow managed to keep myself out of
the snack drawer and even plugged some running into the time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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Its been chaos.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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What I haven’t done, at least not enough, is write.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have three different works-in-progress that
I cannot find the time for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its inexplicable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No, that’s not right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Its simply untrue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhW9sR5lzb2kJ5XNA8cdBU7OqeK1DdZVOYRWo9VLcM2rL6X-Xl1-K85OvBKN4fDIDXCo0jhUkj62lrtMBEAG4kG1A7ylMx1642qIP_YC5Yk5j_K1ttNhplKJNfrlFioAifgin1MY_BKcyI-/s1600/Montucky.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1583" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhW9sR5lzb2kJ5XNA8cdBU7OqeK1DdZVOYRWo9VLcM2rL6X-Xl1-K85OvBKN4fDIDXCo0jhUkj62lrtMBEAG4kG1A7ylMx1642qIP_YC5Yk5j_K1ttNhplKJNfrlFioAifgin1MY_BKcyI-/s200/Montucky.jpg" width="197" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I guess, in all of the chaos, what I’ve not given enough credit
to is the below the surface panic that I have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m not sleeping well and having a few more beers than I generally
would.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess the writing isn’t coming
as I’m not feeling funny.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not funny or
introspective or clever or any other emotion that makes one want to sit at a
computer and share their words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel
worn physically, emotionally and spiritually.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I feel like a worn-out shoe that still needs to serve.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That I can still do the job, just not at the
level that I was designed for.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It seems silly to complain considering the state of things. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People are literally dying out there and my
inability to turn a phrase is among my biggest problems. I suppose that’s the point
though, isn’t it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That our normalcy has
been upended, further upended to be more specific.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Athletes can’t athlete, lawyers can’t lawyer,
teachers can’t teach, servers can’t serve. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The lesson here, girlies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The uncertainty that’s out there right now is stressful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps it’s time to realign what is
considered normal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So maybe looking at
all of this through a different lens.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
feel like a worn-out shoe, fine, maybe the shoe is worn out because the shoe is
loved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m now a chef and a teacher and
a maid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Really, I always have been but
there’s been more help.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it’s a promotion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mostly, we get the chance to spend a lot more
time as a family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There isn’t constant
soccer practices and carpools and homework and choir and drama and piano
lessons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s just us, for a little
while.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it’s time to celebrate the
little wins a little better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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Now, for the love of God, put your dishes in the dishwasher
and your socks in the laundry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The maid
is getting fed up.<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />chrisliamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09776638578544506632noreply@blogger.com0